By punishing murderer with death penalty, the society is also guilty of committing murder. Life in prison is a better punishment for that. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement

When you punish a killer with
death
Add an article
the death
show examples
penalty,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
is
also
guilty of being involved in
killing
Add an article
the killing
show examples
. Rather, life imprisonment is an alternative punishment for killers.
This
essay unequivocally disagrees with the opinion
because
Correct word choice
that
show examples
killing a
murder
Replace the word
murderer
show examples
does not mean the
society
is
also
a
murderer
, and the
murderer
should be killed because he committed an
offense
Change the spelling
offence
show examples
against the
law
.
To begin
with, when a
murderer
is being killed for killing someone,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
has not committed any offence.
This
is because when
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
punishes a
murderer
by death, they are only fulfilling the
law
and they should not feel guilty.
Moreover
, the depth of a murder case would determine if the person should be hung or shot. A good example is the popular fighter, Ibrahim Moses who was sentenced to death by hanging after killing a pregnant woman.
Hence
, the
society
should not feel bad about killing a
murderer
instantly,
In addition
to the above, the
murderer
should be killed for committing an
offense
Change the spelling
offence
show examples
against the
law
.
As a result
,
society
should not feel bad for doing
this
because they are only fulfilling the
law
.
Thus
, hanging a killer isn’t
societally
Rephrase
socially
show examples
wrong. It is something that has come to stay in the
society
.
For example
, Muhammed Ali, a serial killer, was hanged in 2003 because of how he had actively engaged in the killing of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people in Libya.
Thus
,
society
feeling bad about their action should not be so because they are just helping
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
eradicate evil people. In conclusion, killing a
murderer
by hanging or through a shot doesn’t mean
society
has committed an
offense
Change the spelling
offence
show examples
, and they should not feel guilty about it. As
such
, the continuous killing of murderers would reduce the crime rate in
society
.
Submitted by Mabel on

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coherence cohesion
The essay lacked a fully developed logical structure, with some ideas not flowing seamlessly. Include clear topic sentences and ensure that each paragraph logically follows the previous one.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are present but could be improved. The introduction should provide a clearer background and set the tone for the discussion. The conclusion should summarize the main points effectively without introducing new ideas.
coherence cohesion
Main points in support of the argument should be expanded upon with more in-depth explanations and analysis. Aim to fully develop your argument in each paragraph.
task achievement
The response addresses the task, but it does so partially. The argument that 'society should not feel guilty' is repeated instead of being explored from multiple angles or with nuanced discussions.
task achievement
Ideas presented are not fully clear and comprehensive. Work on providing a balanced discussion with a clear articulation of your opinions and arguments for a more sophisticated approach to the essay question.
task achievement
While specific examples are included, they feel somewhat disconnected from the argument. Aim to integrate examples more tightly into the discussion, showing how they directly support your points.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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