These days, children have easy access to home computers, tablet computers, and smartphones, and many spend a large part of their free time using these devices. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this situation and give your own opinion.

In
this
technology era, children are tech-savvy. They can spend hours using intelligent technologies
such
as computers, tablets, and smartphones. Using these devices can help them learn valuable information, but it is
also
detrimental to their well-being and concentration. In
this
essay, I will examine
this
matter's advantages and disadvantages before drawing my conclusion. On the one hand, children can learn helpful information from smart devices. It is because they have access to the internet with abundant knowledge.
This
data is
also
faster and more updated than the ones in the books.
Besides
, they can choose the content they prefer.
For example
, a child can learn a foreign language or a skill by watching video tutorials.
On the other hand
, spending too much time on intelligent screens harms children’s health. For physical health, it may affect their eyes or bodies. Some diseases, including myopia, amblyopia, and back pain, have been becoming more common among the youth generation. It
also
harms mental health,
such
as creating disorder and stress. Another drawback is the loosing of concentration of a child. Social media are designed to create distraction.
For example
, Facebook, TikTok, and YouTube tend to attract viewers through short videos with no helpful content.
Thus
, viewing too many videos like these may influence the concentrative ability. In conclusion,
although
using technology can support children in updating their knowledge, it may harm their well-being and concentration. I believe the drawbacks outweigh the benefits. In my opinion, parents should guide their kids to use smart devices in a suitable way.
Submitted by huyenle1205 on

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task achievement
Your essay presents a clear position throughout the response. To improve task achievement, ensure that the prompt is fully addressed with a more balanced discussion of both advantages and disadvantages, followed by your own opinion. You should also work on providing more detailed examples that directly relate to your main points.
coherence cohesion
The structure of your essay is logical, with a clear introduction and conclusion. To enhance coherence and cohesion, make sure to use a range of cohesive devices and organise your ideas and examples more effectively to ensure a smooth flow of information.

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