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Writing Samples /
Band 4

some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their first training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer.

#people #professionals #doctors #engineers #work #country #first
In
this
 contemporary epoch,people are becoming workaholics.
However
,there are two predominantly contrasting views
whereas
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
a section of society claims that professionals like doctors and engineers,should do their jobs in the nation where they accomplished their internship
while
 others emphasize that they should be independent to do their duties in
desired
Change the article
the desired
show examples
 country.I am of the opinion that medical
practitoners
Correct your spelling
practitioners
 and
architectures
Replace the word
architects
show examples
 should be permitted to work in any country. Apparently,
Submitted by nav93deep12 on

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coherence cohesion
It is important that your essay follows a clear and logical structure. This means starting with an introduction, followed by body paragraphs, each presenting a distinct idea or argument, and concluding with a summary or conclusion. Always ensure your paragraphs flow smoothly from one to the next with appropriate use of linking words and phrases.
task achievement
The essay has not adequately responded to the task as it does not discuss both views and give your own opinion with supporting reasons. The response needs to be developed further, ensuring that it is complete and provides clear, comprehensive ideas and arguments for both sides of the discussion before concluding with your own stance and reasoning.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
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