Some people think that shops should not be allowed to sell food or drink that has been scientifically proved to be bad for people's health. Do you agree or disagree?

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It is often argued that shopkeepers should not promote food products which are scientifically justified to cause significant negative

impacts

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on human health.

This

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essay completely agrees with

this

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statement because it leads to unhealthy lifestyles and affects

people

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with dreadful diseases

such

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as obesity and high blood pressure.

This

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essay will discuss the same and my opinion in detail with relevant examples.

To begin

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with,

people

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are highly influenced to buy

such

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items if stores continue their advertisements.

That is

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to say that, the masses are tempted to drink soft drinks

such

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as Coke or Pepsi even though they know that it would cause potential

impacts

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on their health

due to

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the availability of high sugar content which often leads to issues

such

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as obesity.

However

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, if businesses restrain from selling

such

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products and switch to options like making fresh juices with no added sugars encourage everyone to accustom healthy eating habits.

For instance

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, in India, the government have banned the sales of soft drinks which has resulted in more fresh fruit juice stores across every street.

Secondly

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, conventional foods are another aspect to be considered.

In other words

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, packaged foods have been experimented with by researchers and declared that it had devastating

impacts

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on humans which lead to heart disease and high cholesterol. Despite

this

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awareness, fast food still

promoting

Wrong verb form

promote

show examples

their businesses by selling dishes that are high in salt content.

Therefore

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, preventing them from doing so will inculcate healthy dietary options and reduce the severity of

such

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diseases.

For example

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, it is evident that

people

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who do not consume street foods live longer than expected. In conclusion, it is believed that stores should stop selling eatables that are proven to be unhealthy. I totally agree with

this

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argument concerning the severe health

impacts

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which lead to lowering the life span of

people

Use synonyms

jeeanayWed Dec 06 2023

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coherence cohesion

The essay demonstrates overall clear progression with an appropriate introduction and conclusion. Ideas are generally organized and some examples are effectively used to support the main points. To improve, aim to vary the sentence structures and connectors for better coherence. Additionally, ensure that paragraphs logically flow from one to the next with clearer topic sentences and better-developed ideas.

task achievement

The essay addresses the task and presents relevant ideas, yet at times simplistic expressions are used. Enhance the task response by exploring the complexities of the argument more deeply and discussing potential counterarguments and solutions. Strive for a more balanced discussion that reflects a nuanced understanding of the topic, while remaining focused on the question posed.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

305 words

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Some people think that shops should not be allowed to sell food or drink that has been scientifically proved to be bad for people's health. Do you agree or disagree?

Women and men are commonly seen as having different strengths and weaknesses. Is it right to exclude males or females from certain professions because of their gender? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. •

Some people believe that advertisements aimed at children should be banned. Others argue that advertisements have a positive impact on children. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people believe that school students should be separated based on their abilities and talented, while others think that all students should study together. Discuss both views and express your opinion.

Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.