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Writing Samples
Band 7

in some countries, money is spent on providing education for people in prison is this a good idea or bad idea?

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Investing in
education
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 for prisoners in Nigeria and other African countries is a crucial initiative with significant benefits for both individuals and
society
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. The Nigerian
prison
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 system faces challenges
such
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 as overcrowding and high recidivism rates, with estimates suggesting that up to 75% of released
inmates
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 re-offend. Providing educational
programs
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 can help mitigate
this
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 issue by equipping prisoners with skills that facilitate reintegration into
society
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. Research indicates that
inmates
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 participating in educational
programs
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 are 43% less likely to re-offend compared to those who do not engage in learning activities.
This
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 highlights the potential of
education
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 as a tool for rehabilitation and societal safety.
Furthermore
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, a study by the RAND Corporation found that every dollar spent on
prison
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education
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 saves taxpayers up to $5 in reincarceration costs, underscoring its economic advantages. Beyond financial savings,
education
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 fosters personal growth and responsibility, with many
inmates
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 experiencing positive transformations in their mindset. Often, they become advocates for change in their communities upon release, contributing positively to
society
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.
However
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, concerns exist regarding the allocation of resources. Critics argue that public funds should prioritize mainstream
education
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 over
prison
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education
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, ensuring that children and youth receive quality schooling.
While
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this
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 is a valid concern, it is essential to recognize that
prison
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education
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 does not detract from broader educational investments.
Instead
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, it complements efforts to build a safer
society
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 by reducing crime rates and alleviating the burden on the criminal justice system. To maximize the impact of
prison
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education
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programs
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, authorities should adopt a structured approach, ensuring that courses align with labour market demands. Collaboration with employers and vocational training institutions can enhance employment prospects for former
inmates
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, ultimately breaking the cycle of crime and poverty. In conclusion, investing in
education
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 for prisoners is not merely an expenditure but a strategic investment in the future.
While
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 financial concerns must be addressed, the long-term benefits—reduced recidivism, safer communities, and economic savings—far outweigh the costs. By supporting
prison
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education
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programs
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, Nigeria and other African nations can create a more just and productive
society
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, reinforcing the principles of rehabilitation and second chances.

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Task Achievement
Consider adding more specific examples or anecdotes to illustrate your points further, particularly regarding personal transformations of inmates through education.
Coherence and Cohesion
While your essay flows well, consider using more varied cohesive devices to enhance transitions between ideas, making the connections even clearer.
Task Achievement
Your essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic and effectively presents a balanced argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is strong, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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