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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows different sources of air pollutants in the UK from 1990 to 2005.

The graph below shows different sources of air pollutants in the UK from 1990 to 2005.
#sources #air #pollutants #uk
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The line graph illustrates information about three various types of resources which took part in the
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
 process in the UK over the given 15-
year
Use synonyms
 time period, between 1990 and 2005. Units are measured in
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
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.
Overall
Linking Words
, in terms of atmosphere toxic waste, the industry experienced the highest proportion of
this
Linking Words
 process
while
Linking Words
 households and transport
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
stayed
at
Change preposition
apply
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below 2
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
 of
air
Use synonyms
 pollutants given the
15-yearyear
Correct your spelling
15-year year
15-year-year
 time zone. Both 3 different types of
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
 resources declined dramatically from 1990 to 2005
year
Use synonyms
, respectively. On the one hand, the amount of
pollution
Use synonyms
 by industry resources
was seen
Wrong verb form
saw
show examples
 a sharp decrease till
the
Correct article usage
apply
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1999
year
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, with approximately 3
million
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tonnes
Use synonyms
 of
pollution
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. After 6 years,
this
Linking Words
 figure stayed at 4
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
 till 2002,
then
Linking Words
 it went down slightly.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the transport consumption fluctuated in the same range ,
such
Linking Words
 as 1.5 and 2
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
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 of
air
Use synonyms
 pollutants during the whole
year
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 period. Turning to household figures, for the first 9 years, the amount of
pollution
Use synonyms
 measured in the same stage,
Linking Words
while
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
fell to
0.5
Rephrase
approximately 0.5
show examples
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
 of
air
Use synonyms
 pollutants, approximately. Following
this
Linking Words
, the total
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
 accounted for a sharp decrease in terms of
million
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tonnes
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, over 15
Use synonyms
year
Correct your spelling
15-year
 period.
Submitted by babayeva.ilayda on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words air, pollution, million, tonnes, year with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stayed" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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