Nowadays many people prefer to study or live in foreign countries. While studying and living abroad brings many benefits to individuals, it also has a number of disadvantages. What are the advantages and disadvantages of leaving your country to live or study abroad? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Most

people

Use synonyms

are interested

to go

Change preposition

in going

show examples

abroad

for

Change preposition

show examples

study or

improving

Wrong verb form

improve

show examples

their lifestyles ,

however

Linking Words

, even though there are lots of benefits to migration

but

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

it has some downfall

also

Linking Words

there.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of immigration.

Firstly

Linking Words

, international

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

people

Use synonyms

who live abroad get many benefits during their stay.

Whereas

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

like to go there for many reasons

such

Linking Words

as, to obtain high standard

education

Change preposition

of education

show examples

, get foreign experience and high paid jobs compared to their own

country

Use synonyms

According to

Linking Words

my experience

Add a comma

show examples

my job which is Software Engineering has high demand and a high pay scale in the USA, Canada and Australia.

Therefore

Linking Words

, immigration provides several benefits to

people

Use synonyms

from third-world countries and makes them move to developed countries.

However

Linking Words

, even have many advantages in migration,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people

Use synonyms

need to

sacrify

Correct your spelling

sacrifice

lots of things as well.

For example

Linking Words

, after

left

Wrong verb form

leaving

show examples

their family and home,

need

Correct article usage

the need

show examples

to adapt to a different

culture

Use synonyms

and

must

Verb problem

being

show examples

fluent in foreign languages

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

not an easy thing.

For example

Linking Words

, I have left my family to study in Canada and when there is an emergency at home I am unable to go there on time since I'm thousands of miles away from them. When looking at the

culture

Use synonyms

and language as a Sri Lankan I have grown up with

rich

Correct article usage

a rich

show examples

culture

Use synonyms

and beliefs, but it's difficult to follow a foreign

country

Use synonyms

and need to adapt to a new

culture

Use synonyms

Therefore

Linking Words

, living or studying in

foreign

Add an article

a foreign

show examples

country

Use synonyms

has several difficulties as well. To summarize, even though there are lots of advantages when living or studying in another

country

Use synonyms

we have to face several difficulties in order to live there as well.

me.sara22Thu Dec 07 2023

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task achievement

Your essay addresses the task only partially, and the response tends to be repetitive. You should focus more on expanding your ideas and providing a balanced argument throughout the essay. Paragraphing needs work as the ideas are not always logically ordered or clear. Aim to provide a clearer introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, each fulfilling their specific role within the essay. Consider varying your sentence structures and developing your main points with clearer examples and explanations.

coherence cohesion

The coherence and cohesion within your essay are adequate, but there is room for improvement. You should work on better structuring your essay by ensuring logical sequencing of information. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs could be smoother, and use a range of linking phrases to help your essay flow better. The conclusion needs to be clearer and more effectively summarise the points made in the essay. It's also essential to make sure your introduction sets up the topic and your stance effectively.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

279 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Cultural diversity
Language immersion
Self-reliance
Career advancement
Academic excellence
Homesickness
Culture shock
Cost of living
Language barrier
Visa regulations

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