Advertisements are becoming more and more common in everyday life. Is it a positive or negative development?
Advertisements take up more and more space in daily life. In my opinion,
advertisements
increasing Correct article usage
the advertisements
day
by day
is a positive development
which can lead to improved competition among the
Correct article usage
apply
companies
and to
ensure a growing national economy.
Fix the infinitive
apply
To begin
with, there are positive consequences of advertising increasing day
by day
for companies
and customers
. Most
important Add an article
A most
The most
development
is that this
can ensure more competition among the dominant companies
in the market. This
leads to companies
to increase
their product
diversity and they try to enhance their customer satisfaction. In this
way, customers
can have a choice of
a better Change preposition
between
product
and better
purchase. Take some Correct article usage
a better
customers
, who have some criteria for choosing a product
, for example
; they can create an attention-grabbing difference in the quality of product
as they are picky people.
Add an article
the product
a product
Moreover
, this
can provide positive development
for the national economy. Advertisement
can encourage the economic growth of businesses in many different sectors.Fix the agreement mistake
Advertisements
This
promotion firstly
owns companies
' improvement economically that can be through attracting more customers
and then
it contributes to their industries that more money is in circulation as both production and consumption increase
. All of these may lead to economic welfare which can increase
employment and can create new job opportunities. In this
way, the country's economy has benefited from the positive effect of these.
To conclude
, although
the increase
in advertising may seem bad at first that it becomes more and more popular, it has brought some positive consequences for this
to be considered positive
Add an article
a positive
development
.Submitted by ilknurkaradmn on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which is good, but they could be clearer and more articulate, offering a stronger thesis statement and summary of arguments.
logical structure
For coherence and cohesion, ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea that is expanded upon. Use a range of linking words and phrases to create better flow between sentences and paragraphs.
supported main points
Your body paragraphs do start with topic sentences, but the development of the ideas could benefit from more specific examples and elaboration to fully support the points made. Try to incorporate evidence or data to back up your statements for a stronger argument.
complete response
While the essay addresses the prompt, the ideas could be more fully extended. Be sure to answer all parts of the question and develop each point thoroughly. Refer to the prompt regularly to stay on track.
clear comprehensive ideas
The ideas in the essay are understandable but could be expressed more precisely and with a greater degree of clarity. Aim for a more sophisticated range of vocabulary and sentence structures.
relevant specific examples
You provided some general examples, but to achieve a higher score, include more detailed and specific examples that are directly relevant to the points you're making.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!