some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. discuss both these views and give your own opinion

#people #attention

Some individuals believe that advertising is beneficial for companies to convince new customers to purchase new things

while

others think that it is overrated and people

got

Wrong verb form

get

show examples

used to it to the level that it does not affect anyone anymore.

This

essay agrees with the former opinion. Advertisement helps people understand the value of the products in the market.

That is

because many options may be present in a machine but the general public does not know that information. By explaining to the customers how

this

product will be beneficial to them or make their lives easier, they will be persuaded to buy it.

In addition

to that, marketing aims to understand the mindset of the consumers so that when a product is being advertised it can be relevant to their needs. Those who think that we are used to advertising that we no longer give it attention have many varied reasons.

Such

as the notion that advertisements are forced on us either on the television or on the internet.

For example

, in recent years YouTube has installed an update that you are required to watch 5 seconds of an advertisement before you watch the video you intended to watch. That has resulted in the rebellious movement of many people nowadays. Having looked at both sides, I completely agree with the importance of marketing to educate customers and persuade them to buy new products.

However

, many others think that it is repetitive and of no value anymore because of all the pressure that company owners are putting on the consumers that it lost its value.

Submitted by nadasoltan818 on Thu Dec 07 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Response

Your introduction contemporaneously paraphrases the prompt and establishes a one-sided opinion rather than discussing both views equally as the prompt requires. You must ensure that you provide a balanced consideration of both sides of the argument before presenting your own standpoint in the conclusion.

Task Response

The essay partially develops the argument with some general supporting details, but specific examples are missing, which reduces the effectiveness of your response. To improve, include concrete examples or data to substantiate your points, which will enhance the persuasiveness and depth of your argument.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay displays a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the transitions between ideas can be smoother and more explicit to guide the reader through your arguments seamlessly.

Coherence and Cohesion

While paragraphs are present and each paragraph introduces a central idea, the essay lacks variety in sentence structures, and cohesive devices could be better utilized to link ideas more coherently within and across paragraphs.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

265 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

persuade
promote
attract
influence
impact
consumerism
commercialism
market
product
brand
endorsement
manipulative
saturated
overwhelmed
repetitive
distracting
irrelevant
exaggerated
misleading
desensitized

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Nowadays, a growing number ofpeople with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
These days, an increasing number of individuals rely on alternative health treatments, rather than than attending their doctors. Some argue that non-traditional methods are more beneficial, while others oppose this view believing that it is dangerous. I truly agree with the latter opinion, and this essay will explain why.
6.5
band
Recent advances in medical science have resulted in increased life expectancy over the past few years. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
Breakthroughs in medical science have made lifespan longer these years. This phenomenon has obvious benefits and I firmly believe that they outweigh the drawbacks. In this essay, I plan to highlight a few of my thoughts with supportive examples.
5.5
band
In some area of the US, a 'curfew' is imposed, in which teenagers are not allowed to be out of doors after a particular time at the night unless they are accompanied by an adult. What is your opinion about this?
Today we have many accidents that happen at night. Hence, the US government imposed a 'curfew' to protect people, especially teenagers are not allowed to be on the streets after a specific time at night unless they are accompanied by an adult to protect them. I fully agree that it is the best requirement and solution to create a safer atmosphere on the streets.
7
band
In today's world, people spend a lot of money on appearance because they want to look younger. Why does this happen? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
In today’s society, it is common for people to spend significant amounts of money on their appearance, often with the goal of looking younger. This trend can be attributed to various factors, including the influence of the media, social competitive pressure, and personal psychological needs. Overall, l believe this development can be positive if approached with correct guidance and self-control.
5.5
band
Some think that people should not change th9eir jobs while others think they should because it brings advantages for themselves, the company and society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
It is argued that by changing jobs, an individuals can bring benefit to themselves and the company as it provides new opportunity and continuation. Meanwhile, it also has its own issues such as its stress and time constraint. Personally, I see the advantage may exceed the detrimental aspects.

some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Nowadays, a growing number ofpeople with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Recent advances in medical science have resulted in increased life expectancy over the past few years. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In some area of the US, a 'curfew' is imposed, in which teenagers are not allowed to be out of doors after a particular time at the night unless they are accompanied by an adult. What is your opinion about this?

In today's world, people spend a lot of money on appearance because they want to look younger. Why does this happen? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Some think that people should not change th9eir jobs while others think they should because it brings advantages for themselves, the company and society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.