It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal life. Does the advantages outweighs the disadvantages.

#people #risks #lives #life

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It is often believed that taking risks may be beneficial to people in their professional

as well as

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personal lives.

Although

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this

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is not always advantageous, the ability of an individual to take the right chances at the right moments may significantly determine their life trajectory. In

this

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essay, I will weigh the pros against the cons of

such

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a belief system. To start with, history is filled with stories of people who have chosen to take risks.

For instance

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, Sir Alex Ferguson, who was the manager of the football club Manchester United between 1989 to 2013, had replaced his entire first team to field a bunch of youngsters from the academy in the football league.

While

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this

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was considered foolhardy by many at that time, the gamble ultimately paid off and his teams went on to win several trophies.

This

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highlights the importance of taking calculated risks at the appropriate time.

Furthermore

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this

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tendency to take a chance can

also

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benefit one's personal life.

For instance

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, in a popular TV show, if the lead character

did

Verb problem

had

show examples

not

rush

Wrong verb form

rushed

show examples

to the airport to confess his love to his romantic interest, they may never have had their happily ever after!

While

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the positives may be inspirational to read, what of the failures? It is seldom acknowledged that taking these gambles may

also

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lead to disproportionate failures. A notable example of

this

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is the colossal failure of the company 'We Work' to achieve its targets when going public. The company's CEO, Adam Neumann, gambled his entire wealth on his ability to talk his way into investments.

However

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, when detailing the company's financial details, analysts all over the world rebuked Mr. Neumann's philosophy which led to a tumbling of its shares and a subsequent

bankcruptcy

Correct your spelling

bankruptcy

This

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must serve as a warning of the dangerous consequences of one's choices. In conclusion, high risk may be associated with high reward.

Nevertheless

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, one must always consider the realistic possibility of failure when making

this

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choice and only plunge if they're feeling really confident.

Submitted by vinayanand240 on Fri Dec 08 2023

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Coherence and Cohesion

To improve your score in Coherence and Cohesion, ensure that your ideas transition smoothly from one to the next. Use a variety of linking phrases and cohesive devices effectively. Additionally, keep your paragraphs well-organized with clear topic sentences that align with your supporting sentences.

Task Achievement

Regarding Task Achievement, your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the prompt and an attempt to cover all parts of the task. However, your idea development could be more balanced and detailed, particularly in discussing the disadvantages of taking risks. Aim to elaborate equally on both sides of the argument and ensure that your position is clear throughout the essay, not just at the conclusion.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

337 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

innovate
significant advancements
resilience
breakthroughs
comfort zones
calculated risks
psychological resilience
creative problem-solving
empower
venture
setbacks
uncertainty
navigate
driver

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It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal life. Does the advantages outweighs the disadvantages.

Most people believe that social media such as Facebook and Instagram negatively impact on society and individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In most societies juvenile crime is increasing. Discuss some possible reasons for this and suggest solutions

The illustrations show how chocolate is produced. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

in some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city.