The chart below shows the average hours spent per day in leisure and sports activities by youngest and oldest populations in the US in 2015.

#hours #leisure #sports #activities #populations

The given bar chart describes the average hours of people who , are about 15 - 19 and 76 and over, consumed their each day for different types of leisure and

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

activities in the year 2015 in the United States of America. Units are measured in hours.

Overall

, it is clear that the oldest and youngest population of the US spent most of their time

Change preposition

apply

show examples

watching TV ,

while

the former spent

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

less time on

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

show examples

, exercise and relaxation , and the latter

ones did

Verb problem

spent

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

relaxing and thinking. Looking at the information in more detail , the people who are 75 and

over spent

Correct your spelling

overspent

show examples

nearly 4.5 hours ,which was

most

Correct article usage

the most

show examples

, on watching TV per day ,

whereas

the figures for the

ones

who are 15-19 were under 2.5 . As far as the next details are concerned, in terms of three details ,which are Watching TV , Reading, Relaxing ,

thinking

Correct word choice

and thinking

show examples

, the oldest

ones

had the advantage over the youngest

ones

However

, the latter

ones

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

had the advantage over those in terms of socializing , communicating, playing games , doing

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

show examples

exercise and

recreation

Replace the word

recreational

show examples

activities.

Submitted by yoqubjonovjamshidbek23 on Fri Dec 08 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words ones with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

▼

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

194 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
The spread of a ‘global language’ such as English will threaten national languages. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
It can be seen an increase in usage of english language in the world.Some argue that due to over usage of Engligh would affect other languages negatively. I agrees with the phenomenon on spread of english throughout the world will be a treat for other native languages because nowadays english is an internationally recognised language and governments invest funds on english education at schools.
6
band
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say that ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?
The population in most parts of the world is ageing; people are living longer and there are fewer younger people in many places as birth rates fall. This phenomenon has pros and cons, but this essay will contend that, on balance, the advantages of having an older population outweigh the negatives.
6
band
many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. some people however that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion
In many cases, the authorities are sure that developing the economy plays a major role in the country, nevertheless, there are individuals who oppose this opinion saying that there is a great number of factors which are significant in the same way. In this essay, I will discuss both these points of view and give my own opinion on the matter. Firstly, I will discuss why economic progress makes the country and its citizens powerful by the example of America and secondly, I will explore why science is probably a key to the future.
7.5
band
Some people consider price as the most important thing to think about when buying products (such as cell phone) or service (e.g. medical treatment). Do you agree or disagree?
It is thought that the price of a product or service is essential to consider before deciding to purchase something. While I agree that people need to consider carefully before spending large amounts of money in order to avoid debt, the necessity of the purchase must play a role in the decision to buy.
7
band
Many people believe that big businesses in addition to generating profits should be involved in and responsible for the social life of the community. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
The social life of the society has been one of the serious issues, especially over the last decade. Nowadays, companies are increasingly ramping up their focus on social responsibilities, whether its championing women's rights, protecting the environment, or attempting to obliterate poverty, on local, national, or global levels. I completely agree with this statement that believes big corporations should pay attention to social problems as much as to making profit.

The chart below shows the average hours spent per day in leisure and sports activities by youngest and oldest populations in the US in 2015.

The spread of a ‘global language’ such as English will threaten national languages. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. some people however that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Some people consider price as the most important thing to think about when buying products (such as cell phone) or service (e.g. medical treatment). Do you agree or disagree?

Many people believe that big businesses in addition to generating profits should be involved in and responsible for the social life of the community. To what extent do you agree or disagree?