Some people say that playing computergames is bad for children in every aspect. Ohters say that palying computergames can have positive effects on the way children develop. Discuss both views and give youre opinion

It
is often argues
Change the verb form
is often argued
show examples
that playing computer
games
is not beneficial to
children
,
whereas
others believe playing
video
games
affect
Correct subject-verb agreement
affects
show examples
children
positively. In
this
essay,
Capitalize word
I
show examples
i
Capitalize word
I
show examples
will attempt to outline both ideas and present my own
prespective
Correct your spelling
perspective
. On the one hand, some people believe that there are bad side effects which can bother
children
,
such
as physical problems . Studies shows
the
Correct determiner usage
that
show examples
children
who play more
video
games
ar
Correct your spelling
are
show examples
more likely to suffer from backache and eyesight problem because they were staring
to monitor
Change preposition
at monitors
show examples
for too long during the day .
This
has caused notoriety for
video
games
.
On the other hand
, there are some pros in playing
video
games
that can benefit
children
.
For instance
, a
veriety
Correct your spelling
variety
of educational
video
games
has been created that kids can learn from them ,
such
as
mathgames
Correct your spelling
math games
, english learning
games
and so on.
Thus
,
This
could be
helpfull
Correct your spelling
helpful
for younger individuals as their
growing
Wrong verb form
grow
show examples
up. In my opinion,
although
playing
video
games
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
disadvantages ,
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
of playing
video
games
outweighs
Change the verb form
outweigh
show examples
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
.
Also
, the effectiveness of these
games
on kids should be used in a way that leads to progress .
To sum up
,
while
two ideas
how
Correct your spelling
show
show examples
their significance and importance, playing
video
games
by
children
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
more beneficial impacts.
Submitted by amirrezadelghandi3 on

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Introduction
You should ensure your introduction clearly outlines the intention of the essay and sets the tone for the discussion. The introductory paragraph could be improved by clarifying the statement of both views and your thesis
Body Paragraph Content
Back up your main points with clear examples and explanations to strengthen the argument. Providing specific examples related to the topic will significantly impact the persuasiveness of your essay.
Conclusion
Conclusions should effectively summarize the points discussed and reiterate your stance in a clear and concise manner. Restate the main points and your opinion without introducing new information.
Sentence Structure and Cohesion
The essay lacks variety in sentence structures and connectors. Employ a range of complex sentence forms and cohesive devices to improve the flow of ideas.
Paragraphing
Ensure proper paragraphing techniques are used. Each paragraph should have a clear central idea and be distinct from other paragraphs, with proper transitions to guide the reader.
Grammar and Accuracy
It's vital to proofread your essay to eliminate grammatical errors and improve clarity. Attention to detail regarding spelling and consistent verb tenses is necessary to maintain a high level of English competency.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • addiction
  • physical activity
  • violent content
  • cognitive skills
  • problem-solving
  • strategic thinking
  • hand-eye coordination
  • educational games
  • interactive learning
  • teamwork
  • collaboration
  • communication skills
  • academic performance
  • stress relief
  • mental health
  • parental guidance
  • moderation
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