Fewer young people play sports these days. Why is this? what can be done to encourage more young people to do sports.

In the contemporary era, there has been a downward tendency in the number of youngsters engaging in
sports
activities. In my perspective, the main reasons are modernization and many social norms. By solving the mentioned problem, I think that educational institutions could play a pivotal role in stimulating more young people to play
sports
.
To begin
with, there are many focal points to explain
this
trend. It is true that the significant development of modernization leads to the growth in the number of new technologies,
such
as smartphones.
This
has created a concern that the plethora of young people have been exposed
these
Change preposition
to these
show examples
equipments since their childhood, because of the lack of family attention that their parents are usually absorbed in their work.
Therefore
, the young could form an entertaining habit that they get addicted to,
such
as video games rather than participating in
sports
.
Besides
, there is a common social norm in many Asian countries
such
as Korea or China that the parents usually orient their children to be white-collar workers, which could be a social model of success.
Thus
, these children tend to spend their childhood in school and more extra classes in their leisure time to make sure that they
could
Wrong verb form
can
show examples
get into top schools or universities and take more opportunities to belong to prosperous citizen groups of societies. Indeed, it is understandable why exercise and
sports
are a luxury for busy
students
. To overcome
this
issue, I believe that educational institutions are the key factor.
Firstly
,
due to
the majority of
students
owning personal smartphones, schools should put strict regulation that bans them from the educational environment.
This
could not only enhance
students
' focus on lessons
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but
also
give them more playtime to join other healthy activities.
Thus
, it is necessary for the syllabus to create many optional
sports
classes or
sports
clubs
such
as soccer, volleyball or badminton to encourage
students
to improve their health and social interaction with friends and teachers rather than keeping their eyes glued to smartphones and leading a sedentary lifestyle. In conclusion, the decrease in young people's interest in
sports
could be explained by modernization tendencies and social bias in many cultures.
Therefore
, it is vital to solve
this
issue through educational institutions
such
as building learning programs, which have typical
sports
or clubs.
Submitted by phuonglinhlp.0900 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure that all paragraphs are well-developed and stay on topic, expanding on the main points with examples to fully address the essay prompt.
coherence and cohesion
To strengthen coherence and cohesion, provide clear transitions between ideas and ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly into the next. Use a variety of cohesive devices and topic sentences effectively.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • sedentary
  • engagement
  • incentives
  • obesity
  • recreation
  • well-being
  • peer pressure
  • physical fitness
  • endurance
  • balance
  • teamwork
  • coordination
  • confidence
  • self-esteem
  • discipline
  • facilities
  • accessible
  • affordable
  • curriculum
  • extracurricular
  • inclusion
What to do next:
Look at other essays: