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Band 7

Some people think that radio is the best way to get the news while others think that television is better for this purpose.

#people #radio #news #television #purpose
The importance of
both
TV
 and
radio
 which was always debatable has now become more controversial with many people claiming that
TV
 is a better source of information
while
 others argue that
radio
 is the best way for
news
. I am of the opinion that
both
 are equally effective and
both
 have their own advantages, which will be discussed
further
 in
this
 essay,
along with
 a logical conclusion. Analyzing the statement and explaining
further
, the first and foremost reason behind
TV
 as a good way of
news
 is that
news
 on
TV
 has a very strong effect on the mind because audio-visual clipping is more retainable. Another striking benefit in
this
 regard is that even an uneducated person can
also
 understand the information and make his opinion. Categorically , it cannot be ignored that the main reason behind
this
 is that with the advancement of technology,
TV
 services are global and 24/7. On the other side,
radio
 is the oldest version of technology. It is more accessible as the reach is through mobiles, car radios and even the smallest apparatus. Another pivotal aspect is that the clarity is high and no setup or electricity is required.
Moreover
,
radio
 stations are almost in every city. Nowadays,
news
 is on air with the help of satellites.
Hence
, it is apparent why many are in favour of radios. In conclusion,
according to
 the arguments aforementioned above, one can reach the conclusion that
both
 methods of getting
news
 are equally beneficial.
TV
 provides advanced graphics
along with
 a piece of
news
 and, radios are portable
as well as
 easily accessible.
Submitted by jagdeepsingh3699 on

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Coherence & Cohesion
Your essay provides a fair logical structure with a clear introduction and conclusion, which is integral for the reader to follow your argument. However, more emphasis on transitional phrases would enhance the flow of the essay between ideas and paragraphs.
Task Achievement
It's important to directly address the essay prompt, which asks for a comparison and a personal opinion on which method is best. Your conclusion seems to indicate you find both methods equal, which doesn't entirely align with the prompt asking for you to pick one over the other. Establish a clearer stance in line with the IELTS task response requirements.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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