Discuss the implications of the growing influence of artificial intelligence on the education system in 2023. Consider the potential advantages and disadvantages, and provide examples or evidence to support your points. Write at least 250 words.

The impact of the increasing influence of artificial intelligence (AI) on the
educations
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education
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system in 2023. The rapid
evolvement
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evolution
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of
advance
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advanced
show examples
technology has been
a
Correct article usage
apply
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primarily driven
in
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by
show examples
the growing influence of AI
our
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on our
show examples
social culture, including
education
. In my opinion, AI will contribute positively
on
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to
show examples
education
in 2023, if we
use
it
with
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in
show examples
the
right
way. Artificial intelligence or so we
called
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call
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AI has been the talk
for
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of
show examples
people
in
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for
show examples
several years.
This
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newly
show examples
new
Change the word
newly
show examples
evolve
Wrong verb form
evolved
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technology creates
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apply
show examples
a
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apply
show examples
confusion in society. It has raised a lot of
question
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questions
show examples
like
will
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whether will
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it improve our social
live
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lives
show examples
or give us a
dooms
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doom
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day like the science-fiction movie in
hollywood
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Hollywood
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. In
this
passage, the writers
would
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will
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explain
about
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apply
show examples
how
the
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apply
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AI will influence the
eduction
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education
show examples
sector in 2023. I think
,
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apply
show examples
AI has a lot of
advantage
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advantages
show examples
that will help
people
in their
education
.
For
example
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example,
show examples
it will help
people
to
Verb problem
apply
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get more access,
the
Correct word choice
and the
show examples
learning process
would
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will
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be
easire
Correct your spelling
easier
and more enjoyable. As we might already know, one of the
problem
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problems
show examples
in our
education
is sometimes the student doesn't want to learn because the process of learning is
to
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too
show examples
boring or it is difficult and hard to understand. With AI
this
problem could
be solve
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be solved
show examples
becaue
Correct your spelling
because
with AI we can customize the framework of learning to each student.
However
, AI has its own merits, like
concern
Add an article
the concern
a concern
show examples
of
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for
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data privacy and security, and its impact
to
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on
show examples
children
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children's
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mental. Our critical task is to
use
it with the
right
balance because
at the end
of the
day
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day,
show examples
AI only is a tool that could be
benefit
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beneficial
show examples
if
use
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used
show examples
by
right
Correct article usage
the right
show examples
people
and
right
Add an article
the right
show examples
process.
Therefor
Correct your spelling
Therefore
show examples
,
eventhough
Correct your spelling
even though
AI comes with a great advantage to help
education
in 2023, we need to make sure that
this
AI will
be
Change the verb form
be used
be using
show examples
use
with the
right
balance so it'll improve our social
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
especially
Add the comma(s)
, especially
show examples
in
education
Correct article usage
the education
show examples
sectors
Fix the agreement mistake
sector
show examples
.
Submitted by 2024successielts on

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task response
You need to make sure your response fully addresses all parts of the task. The essay touches on the implications of AI in education but lacks depth and does not fully discuss the advantages and disadvantages of AI as requested.
task response
Improve on presenting clear and focused main ideas. The content currently appears underdeveloped and generalized, without specific detailed examples or evidence to support your points.
task response
Ensure relevance of your examples. The essay requires concrete and relevant examples or evidence to support the discussion, which were largely missing in your response.
coherence cohesion
Organize your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and logically grouped information supporting that idea.
coherence cohesion
Enhance logical progression of ideas. The essay should have a more coherent structure with clear transitions and connectivity between the individual points made.
coherence cohesion
Support main points with developed explanations, details, and examples. Main ideas should be clarified and elaborated upon to show their relevance and to maintain the reader's interest.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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