Some people think companies should employ old people to work as they have a lot of working experience. Others, however, think it is better to recruit young people. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Although
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having a lot of professional
experiences
Fix the agreement mistake
experience
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, some
people
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believe that
companies
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should replace the old workers with the younger
people
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. Meanwhile
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
others believe that
companies
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should keep the
old
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older
show examples
generations
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due to
Linking Words
the
Change the word
their
show examples
maturity and working
experience
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. The following essay will discuss both points of view and present my point of view. Older
generations
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has
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have
show examples
maturity and leadership skills and it will
benefits
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benefit
show examples
company
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management. Some
companies
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employed
Wrong verb form
employ
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older
people
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for leadership
role
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roles
show examples
so they can influence the
company
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policy based on their
experience
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and how they
reading
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read
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the situations.
For instance
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, in some
economics
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economic
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problems, older
people
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can control the situations with their
experience
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so
companies
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can manage the situations
with
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in
show examples
the best possible way. Compared to the younger
generations
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, they tend to do
experiments
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experiment
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methods which is highly risk for the
company
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's sustainability. Many others,
however
Linking Words
, believe that older
people
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workers should be replaced by the younger
generations
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as they are more productive. The younger
employee
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employees
show examples
have better physical ability compared to the older
people
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and they
also
Linking Words
could be better time by time.
For example
Linking Words
, most of the young
employee
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employees
show examples
working in
productions
Correct article usage
the productions
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department as they are more
strenght
Correct your spelling
strength
and able to produce more work so the
compines
Correct your spelling
companies
can get better results. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
older
people
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have the maturity to lead
companies
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, the younger
people
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Linking Words
also
Add a missing verb
are also
show examples
needed
for
Change preposition
from
show examples
production
Correct article usage
a production
show examples
point of view. In my opinion, both
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
their own
streght
Correct your spelling
strengths
and they should be allocated in a
company
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so they can get the balance between the
experience
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wise and productivity aspects.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph clearly conveys one central idea and that this idea is supported by specific examples or evidence. Try to use a variety of linking words to create a more cohesive argument.
task achievement
Enhance task achievement by fully addressing all parts of the prompt. Make sure your argument is balanced, covers both views thoroughly, and provides specific examples for each perspective.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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