IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The best way to reduce poverty in developing countries is by giving up to six years of free education, so that they can at least read, write and use number. To what extent do you agree or disagree

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The most useful step to limit
poverty
Use synonyms
 in modern countries is by providing free
education
Use synonyms
 for
children
Use synonyms
who their
Correct pronoun usage
whose
show examples
 age
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 up to six years which they can at least write, read and use numbers. In my opinion, I totally agree with the statement because making
education
Use synonyms
 free will attract students as much as possible and
children
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 would get
along with
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 the
education
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.
Firstly
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, making the low
education
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 for free would take the attention of students.
In other words
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, the high tuition fee is the key factor for
poverty
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
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,
school
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 tuition fee nowadays has become expensive in many nations,
for example
Linking Words
, the
school
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 tuition fee in
Middle
Correct article usage
the Middle
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 East reached almost 2000$ per year which is very expensive for some parents to take their
children
Use synonyms
 to
school
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.
Therefore
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, many parents might consider
this
Linking Words
 promotion as a chance to join their
children
Use synonyms
 in
school
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. Another point is that
children
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 would get
along with
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 studying after they study basic things.
That is
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 to say, there are a lot of negative stereotypes about studying among
children
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,
for instance
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, many
children
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 are not
matured
Replace the word
mature
show examples
 enough so they think that studying is a big responsibility which they can not take, but it is not in reality,
Hence
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, if
children
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 are learned the basic things ,
such
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 as writing and reading for free they would get
along with
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 studying which is a great thing because they would try to improve their studying.
To sum up
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, I believe that giving up to six years of free
education
Use synonyms
 is the most helpful way to reduce
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
poverty
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. And
also
Linking Words
poverty
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 would be disappeared if many governments implemented
this
Linking Words
 way.

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introduction conclusion present
Your introduction sets the stage for the argument, but it could be strengthened by providing a clearer thesis statement that outlines your main arguments. The conclusion should reiterate your thesis and summarize the main points made in the essay for stronger impact.
logical structure
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that transitions between paragraphs are smooth. This will help to improve the logical flow of your essay. Use a range of cohesive devices such as 'firstly', 'furthermore', 'hence', and 'therefore' to better link your ideas.
supported main points
Develop your main points with more detailed explanations and relevant examples to fully support your argument. The more fleshed out your paragraphs are, the more convincing your essay will be.
clear comprehensive ideas
To achieve a higher score in task achievement, ensure that you fully address all parts of the prompt. This includes discussing the extent of agreement or disagreement and providing clear, comprehensive ideas with more depth and development throughout the essay.
relevant specific examples
Incorporate relevant, specific examples to illustrate and support your points. Doing so provides evidence for your arguments and adds credibility to your essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • literacy and numeracy skills
  • economic development
  • generational poverty
  • civic activities
  • social stability and cohesion
  • health awareness
  • gender gap
  • empowerment
  • job opportunities
  • quality of life
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