An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What are the reasons behind this trend? What solutions can you suggest to deal with this situation?

Recently, a rising number of professionals, like doctors and teachers,
are
Verb problem
have
show examples
moving
Wrong verb form
moved
show examples
to their own poorer states to
have
Verb problem
get
show examples
a
job
in modern
countries
.
This
is mainly because of looking for a better
job
opportunity and developing their own
work
skills
.
Nevertheless
, there are some solutions that can be taken to tackle
this
problem.
Firstly
, one of the reasons is looking for a better
job
opportunity.
in other words
, a lot of modern
countries
provide
features
for professional jobs,
such
as doctors in terms of a higher salary, shorter time and more vacation days. Because of
this
situation, some individuals choose to move to a modern
country
to get
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
better
work
opportunities.
secondly
, developing
workers
'
skills
is one of the main reasons for that. One clear example,
in
Add a missing verb
is in
show examples
some
countries
such
as Yemen, it provides outstanding developed machines for doctors to use , which gives them a good opportunity to improve their own
skills
.
Thus
, if
workers
moved to a developed
country
, their own
skills
would be improved with it. First of all, some poorer
countries
can solve
this
problem with
governments
providing good
features
for professional
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
. To make it clear, if the government give special
job
features
,
such
as a great area for their
job
, they will not move to other
countries
and
then
, they will stuck with their
work
in their
country
.
consequently
, some people would rather
work
in their
country
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
than
other
Change preposition
in other
show examples
countries
. The second solution is to pay attention to improving
workers
'
skills
by
governments
. To illustrate, when
governments
give them some free courses to improve their own
skills
, they will get enough improvement in terms of
skills
. So,
workers
will not look for getting more
skills
and move to other
countriescountry
Correct your spelling
countries
due to
that.
To sum up
,
Giving
Change preposition
by Giving
show examples
them attention
Change preposition
to
show examples
the government
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
governments
should provide good
features
for professionals'
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
. If
governments
gave them
features
, it would yield to them in a good way.
Submitted by asomm5563 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Task Response: The essay attempts to address both parts of the question, but ideas are underdeveloped, and solutions proposed are somewhat repetitive and simplistic. To improve your score, ensure that you provide a more in-depth explanation of reasons and solutions, and that they are fully developed and extended with detailed support.
coherence cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: The essay's organizational structure is evident, but the logical sequencing of information is sometimes unclear, and there are issues with repetitions and the use of cohesive devices. To enhance your score, focus on varying your connectives and ensure that your paragraph structure clearly separates your ideas and provides a logical flow from one to the other.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!