Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more important to work at a job you enjoy than to make a lot of money. Support your answer with specific reasons and examples.

Recently, there has been growing concern over the fact that an enjoyable

job

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is more necessary than a

job

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with a huge

salary

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. Personally, I agree with the given statement and

this

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essay will discuss the reasons why a satisfying

job

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will play an important role in our lifestyle.

To begin

Linking Words

with, the first argument given to support my opinion is that an enjoyable

job

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will be definitely happier than a

job

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with a huge

salary

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This

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is because we will definitely feel happy with a

favorable

Change the spelling

favourable

show examples

job

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Change preposition

apply

show examples

working nine-to-five every day which means that we really live up to the demands of the

job

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without facing any stress from our work

as well as

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still keep up a good attitude in the workplace.

For example

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, many surveys of satisfying jobs in the world show that the majority of

job

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workers in construction are happier than doctors or engineers in the workplace

due to

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being under pressure from working.

For

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this

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reason, we will collaborate on

this

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satisfying

job

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in the long term with the best performance and achieving satisfaction in our careers. Another point advocating

this

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is that an enjoyable

job

Use synonyms

makes it easy to broaden our knowledge from serious research and be able to earn more money from it. The reason is that we still can update new knowledge or be able to leverage potential opportunities to get a higher

salary

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in our enjoyable

job

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instead

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of only focusing on making a lot of money from jobs which are huge salaries.

For instance

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, even many staff in a company, thanks to our concentration and none-stop effort, are promoted to a higher position like senior or leader and

also

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earn more income.

Due to

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this

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, focusing on a main career is more important than a

job

Use synonyms

with a huge

salary

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. In conclusion, there is much solid evidence showing that we should be concentrating on a main career rather than making a lot of money with alternative jobs. In my view, a satisfying

job

Use synonyms

will give us more opportunities and achieve satisfaction in life in the short term

phuocsang4567

Apr 23, 2024

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Expansion

Continue developing your ideas with more depth and detail to strengthen your arguments.

Cohesion

Use a wider range of cohesive devices and paragraph structures to improve the flow and clarity of your essay.

Examples

Aim for more specific examples that directly support your main points for a stronger impact.

Introduction

Your introduction clearly presents your stance on the topic, which helps in setting the direction of your essay.

Conclusion

Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and restates your opinion, which helps in reinforcing your argument.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

349 words

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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more important to work at a job you enjoy than to make a lot of money. Support your answer with specific reasons and examples.

nowadays many people use social media do you think advantages of this outweigh disadvantages

In many countries not enough students are choosing to study science subject. What are causes? And what will be effects on society?

In many countries, people are living longer. What problems does this cause for individuals and society? What can be done to reduce the impact of these issues?