Many people try to achieve success through their career or education. What can success mean to different people? What is your view of success?
In the contemporary era, there are an uncountable amount of ways to reach
destinantions
in professional life or to Correct your spelling
destinations
destination
achieved
Wrong verb form
achieve
success
in science. More and more people
have been trying to broaden horizons
and Correct pronoun usage
their horizons
to
enrich Fix the infinitive
apply
outlooks
day by day. Correct pronoun usage
their outlooks
However
, it seems that for some of them
the goals are not Add a comma
them,
comlicated
and sometimes it Correct your spelling
complicated
is not need
to be a hardworking Change the verb form
does not need
person
to achieve what they trully
want.
First and foremost, it is claimed that Correct your spelling
truly
the
real Correct article usage
apply
success
is always associated with high salaries or ownership high-valuable
property. It seems that, to become Change preposition
of high-valuable
such
a person
it
needs to be Correct pronoun usage
one
high
educated or to be a Replace the word
highly
top-specialist
in Correct your spelling
top specialist
the
company, like Apple, Samsung or SpaceX. It is formally acknowledged thatCorrect article usage
a
,
Ilon Mask, Steve Jobs or any other Remove the comma
apply
person
from Forbes are trully
successful Correct your spelling
truly
people
and they achieve its
Correct pronoun usage
their
accomplishmets
through hard work, discipline and education.
Having said that, Correct your spelling
accomplishments
accomplishment
accomplisment
can be defined not only in Correct your spelling
accomplishment
financial
stability aspectCorrect article usage
the financial
,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
as success
contributing a
society . There is Change preposition
to a
a clear-cut evidence
that, Remove the article
clear-cut evidence
a piece of clear-cut evidence
a shred of clear-cut evidence
people
who have taken part in charity, voulonteer
work or Correct your spelling
volunteer
making
a Wrong verb form
made
cereer
in public service have to be assessed as successful. From my perspective, I Correct your spelling
career
am utterly believe
a Change the verb form
utterly believe
person
whose choice is to be a civil servant are
highly valued in society than all affluent Change the verb form
is
people
together
.
In conclusion, there are many ways to achieve Rephrase
apply
a
Remove the article
apply
success
in real life. It only depends on a personal viewpoint, in which area of modern life it has to be achieved and how it would be defined.Submitted by roker123456 on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay structure requires more clarity; it lacks a solid and discernible introduction, body, and conclusion. Aim to clearly introduce your topic, develop your ideas in separate paragraphs, and provide a summarizing conclusion.
coherence cohesion
The logical flow between ideas is difficult to follow due to disorganized paragraphing and a lack of clear topic sentences. Ensure each paragraph has a main idea and that transitions between them are smooth to guide the reader.
coherence cohesion
The main points in your essay are underdeveloped and require additional support through detailed examples and explanations. Expand on your ideas by giving concrete examples or citing evidence.
task achievement
The response to the essay question appears incomplete and partially developed. Consider addressing each part of the prompt thoroughly to provide a comprehensive answer.
task achievement
Your ideas are not fully clear and comprehensive. To improve, provide a more in-depth analysis of the concept of success and its different interpretations.
task achievement
Specific examples relevant to the topic are sparse or absent. Including personal, historical, or widely recognized examples can significantly strengthen your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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