Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
There are two different perspectives towards unsatisfactory conditions in the workplace. A group of people believe that accepting
this situations
is ideal. Others Change the determiner
this situation
these situations
opines
that they ought to strive to ameliorate the bad situation and Change the verb form
opine
moving
up the Wrong verb form
move
career
ladders
. I firmly agree with the second opinion as it is quintessential to try to improve our Fix the agreement mistake
ladder
career
. In the following essay, I am going to analyze both views.
To commence with, according to
the first opinion, a part of society, especially elderly people, whom some stated in their religion that they need to show patient
in difficult conditions of life, believes that if we have hired in a Replace the word
patience
job
, we should be satisfied with it and accepting its ups and downs as it is a part of the job
itself that we wanted to have without any complainings. While
it is true in some circumstances and
sometimes you need to be patient and show mercy to some obnoxious customers if you want to retain your Correct word choice
apply
career
. However
, every company has a liability to explain completely their requirments
and situations to employees. Correct your spelling
requirements
Therefore
, if one person achieves eligibility, then
he should endure it with passion.
Turning to the other side of the argument, all workers have a right to improve their career
or leave the job
if they are not satisfied enough with it to be prosperous in their lives. In other words
, the laws eneble
people to refuse Correct your spelling
enable
such
items, which are not pleasent
. To cite an example, keeping good relationships with managers is crucial in the workplace. Correct your spelling
pleasant
Whereas
it's not always provided for some workers and may affect negatively their performances.
In conclusion, Correct word choice
However
although
it is paramount to be patient and accountable in office
and Correct article usage
the office
doing
our duties loyally, Wrong verb form
do
but
we Correct word choice
apply
absoloutly
need to improve our Correct your spelling
absolutely
job
position or even leave it if feeling
unsatisfied and start doing another one.Wrong verb form
we feel
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coherence cohesion
To enhance the logical structure, make sure your essay contains a clear introduction, at least two body paragraphs discussing each view separately, and a cohesive conclusion that restates your stance. Use transitional phrases to effectively connect your sentences and paragraphs for a more seamless flow.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present but could be strengthened. Ensure your introduction sets the stage for the discussion by clearly stating the two views and your opinion. In your conclusion, re-emphasize your stance without introducing new information, bringing your essay to a concise and persuasive close.
task achievement
Main points are identified but require better support with more concrete examples and evidence. Specific examples are used but could be more relevant and detailed. Develop your arguments by citing studies, statistics, or real-life scenarios that directly relate to the topic. This will provide more weight to your claims and improve the persuasiveness of your essay.
task achievement
To fully address the task, you need to explore both views equally and present a clear, consistent opinion throughout the essay, supported by reasoning and examples. Your ideas need to be expressed clearly and explained comprehensively, ensuring your personal stance is woven into the discussion of both views.
task achievement
Avoid grammatical errors and informal language, which can detract from the clarity and professionalism of your writing. Proofread your work before submission to correct any mistakes.
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