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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The charts below show the total number of applicants the year before and the year after Doolittle University’s social media advertising campaign, organized by age range and how close the applicants live to the university.

#show #applicants #year #doolittle #university’s #media #campaign #age #range #university
The bar chart provides data related to
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of
applicants
 in a UK university from 1999 to 2003. The university
applicants
 came from European Nations,
Middle
Correct article usage
the Middle
show examples
 East,
Far
Correct article usage
the Far
show examples
 East, and Africa.
Overall
,
applicants
 from
Far
Correct article usage
the Far
show examples
 East
shown
Wrong verb form
showed
show examples
 an increase
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 trends over the period
while
 the
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
 of European Nations
applicant
Fix the agreement mistake
applicants
show examples
indicates
Wrong verb form
indicated
show examples
 a decline.
According to
 the data, in 1999, the proportion of
applicants
 from European countries reached a peak at 35.000.
However
, the number constantly declined and reached
the
Change the word
its
show examples
 lowest point by 2003 at around 10.000.
In contrast
, the
applicants
 that
comes
Change the verb form
come
show examples
 from
Far
Correct article usage
the Far
show examples
 East displayed a rise from 15.000 in 1999 to 30.000 in 2003, which doubled the
initials
Change the noun form
initial
show examples
 numbers. Africa
have
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 a period of stability between 1999 and 2001 at roughly 2.500 candidates, it was the lowest
rates
Fix the agreement mistake
rate
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 compared to
three
Correct article usage
the three
show examples
 other regions. The
last
 area to be mentioned is
Middle
Correct article usage
the Middle
show examples
east
Capitalize word
East
show examples
 which had
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fluctuative
Correct your spelling
fluctuating
 trends over the period, in 2001 15.000
applicants
comes
Wrong verb form
came
show examples
 from
this
 area
then
 the number
had
Verb problem
apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
decline
Replace the word
declined
show examples
 by 2.500 of margin in 2002. The proportion
then
 rose again and reached 20.000
as it is
Correct your spelling
at its
show examples
 highest point.
Submitted by ryanrush16 on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words applicants with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trends" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 3 times.
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