IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

You have bought a new camera but when you got it home you found it had some problems. You returned the camera and spoke to the company representative a week ago but the camera has still not been repaired. Write a letter to the company.  In your letter: Introduce yourself Explain the situation Say what action you would like the company to take

#camera #home #company #representative #week #situation #action
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to ask you about
testing
Correct article usage
the testing
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 and repair of a Sony camera,which I bought a week
before
Rephrase
ago
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.I am Karina , a regular customer of your company .I bought a couple of digital items,
such
 as four smartphones ,a laptop and a digital camera. The product I sent to your customer service
center
Change the spelling
centre
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 for repair
last
 Monday was the second one, which I
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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bought it one week ago.
Unfortunatly
Correct your spelling
Unfortunately
,when I brought it back to my home , I found it doesn't work again.As a regular customer of your company ,I did not distrust
about
Change preposition
apply
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your items
,
Remove the comma
apply
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and did not test
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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 at your shop that day.
This
 digital camera is prepared for our family trip to Tashkent next month.My father dreams of taking it and
record
Wrong verb form
recording
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 magnificent
landscape
Fix the agreement mistake
landscapes
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and personal memory
picture
Fix the agreement mistake
pictures
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.
Howevet
Correct your spelling
However
,it has already been over a week currently.I would like to get a determined time for my purchase, please. Please let me know what you plan as soon as possible and do
furthe
Correct your spelling
further
 discussion. Best regards, Karina.
Submitted by ina1_95 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure each paragraph presents a clear main idea and stays focused on that idea without unnecessary digressions.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use a logical structure with appropriate transitions to create a clear sequence of ideas for easier comprehension.
Coherence and Cohesion
Remember to use proper greeting and closing conventions for a formal letter.
Task Achievement
Ensure your response fully satisfies all requirements of the task, with each point described in sufficient detail.
Task Achievement
Maintain a consistently appropriate tone throughout the letter; a mix of personal anecdote and formal complaint language should be managed carefully.
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