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Writing Samples
Band 5

You said you would attend your best friend's birthday party, but you did not go. Write a letter to your friend. In the letter apologise for not going explain why you were not there, say how you will make up for it.

#friend #birthday #party #apologise
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Dear Aman, How are you? I hope you've been well. I'd like to apologize for not coming to your birthday party. I know it was an important day for you and being a best friend I need to be with you
at
Change preposition
on
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this
 special occasion. I really feel bad for not coming to the party but I got stuck in a family problem. Actually, a day before your birthday my father
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
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met with an accident. It was a minor accident but still doctor suggested
him
Correct pronoun usage
he
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to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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be on bed rest for a week. I was unable to leave my dad and family in
this
 situation. You don't need to worry about him; he is fine now. I know you would have missed me, so I am thinking of coming to your place
during
Change preposition
apply
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next weekend and
spend
Wrong verb form
spending
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 some quality time with you and your family. You will be glad to see the gift which I bought for you. I can't wait to see you! Best regards, Simran
Submitted by bhullarsimran2121 on

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coherence cohesion
Make sure to structure the letter in clear paragraphs with one central idea per paragraph for enhanced readability.
task achievement
Include a stronger expression of apology and a more elaborate plan on how you intend to make up for your absence to fully satisfy the task requirements.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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