IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some people think that paying taxes is a big enough contribution to society, while others think people have more responsibilities as a member of society than only paying taxes. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #taxes #contribution #society #responsibilities #member
In today's world, paying money to the government contributes to our society and our obligation to
support
 the mutual public system.
However
, other folklore groups consider doing more to help those in poor conditions. I will discuss both views and show my opinion in the following paragraphs. I insist that individuals should dedicate themselves to volunteer work or join charitable activities, not just
only
Rephrase
apply
show examples
by paying taxes.
To begin
 with, some citizens consider that paying taxes aims to aid the development of countries,
such
 as annual taxes are provided to invest in infrastructure and industry.
For example
, the government of Kaohsiung spent about 200 million dollars building the large Kaohsiung arena, providing an auditory place for celebrities and singers to hold concerts, which helps boost the economy.
On the other hand
, people have the opposite opinion and find that the only payment system does not have enough
support
 for our society.
For instance
, nursing homes and hospitals need more volunteers to assist patients,
such
 as guiding visitors in the right direction and providing information.
Additionally
, donating is a good way to help those who are in poverty condition, either with money or food. In summary, some global residents may claim that only paying tariffs significantly supports society;
on the contrary
, others believe in helping others with physical and mutual
support
. People have to devote themselves to our community through philanthropic efforts, being involved in actual
support
 actions, and donating to charities or foundations.
Submitted by aa0963178783 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that your points are logically structured throughout the essay and that there's a clear progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion.
Coherence and Cohesion
Both introductory and concluding paragraphs could be improved in terms of clearly presenting your main arguments and summarizing them effectively in the end.
Coherence and Cohesion
Support main points with a range of relevant examples. Examples should be specific and clearly connected to the points they are intended to illustrate.
Task Achievement
Address all parts of the task ensuring that responses to the prompt are complete and fully developed; however, your opinion should be clearly stated and stand out throughout the essay.
Task Achievement
Ideas should be expressed clearly and explained comprehensively; simplicity is often the key to clarity. Be direct and make sure the reader can easily understand the points you're trying to make.
Task Achievement
Using some real-life, relevant examples is good, but strive to incorporate more details and a wider range of examples to substantiate your arguments effectively.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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