Nowadays celebrities earn more money than politicians. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or negative development?

#celebrities #money #politicians #development

In the present time, a large number of

people

claim that famous

people

receive more income than

politicians

This

essay will discuss the reasons for

this

status and showcase whether it is a positive or negative development.

To begin

with the reasons, the entertainment industry is one of the wealthiest businesses because of the huge support from

people

all around the world. it doesn't matter where you are, since you have internet access you can easily get into a streaming platform

such

as Netflix or YouTube or any similar platform and enjoy watching your favourite shows, and

as a result

, those companies earn more

money

from your views.

For instance

, almost every single person recognises the name “Leo Messi” or “Will Smith” , two worldwide famous superstars.

whereas

pupils who work in politics are only known in their countries.

In addition

, famous are able to obtain income in several approaches.

For example

, famous

people

receive a large amount of

money

from a single advertisement or representing a company.

However

, I personally believe that the situation in which celebrities earn more

money

than

politicians

is negative, as high wages are one of the methods to encourage individuals to work for the public.

Therefore

, if the government does not solve

this

issue,

politicians

could go for illegal ways to gain more wealth

such

money

laundering. as far as I am concerned, in terms of the development of the countries, the governments should pay higher salaries to individuals who work in politics filled decrease the rate of resignation of present

politicians

Submitted by asoom on Wed Dec 13 2023

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Coherence & Cohesion

The essay lacks a clear logical structure; ideas do not flow smoothly and lack logical sequencing. Make sure paragraphs are well-organized with clear topic sentences that introduce the paragraph's main idea.

Coherence & Cohesion

There is an attempt at an introduction and conclusion, but they are not well-developed. Ensure the introduction clearly sets up the topic and your stance, while the conclusion effectively summarizes your points and restates your opinion.

Coherence & Cohesion

Main points are mentioned but not developed with sufficient detail. Expand on your ideas by providing more in-depth explanations and a wider range of examples.

Task Achievement

While the response addresses the task, it is incomplete. Expansion on main points and a more thorough analysis of the reasons for the phenomenon and its implications would improve completeness.

Task Achievement

Ideas presented are not comprehensive and need further development. Enhance clarity by fully elaborating on points and providing necessary explanations to strengthen the argument.

Task Achievement

The essay includes examples, but they are not fully relevant or specific enough. Use precise and directly relevant examples to back your points and demonstrate your argument effectively.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

260 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

endorsements
revenue streams
global presence
diversified branding
income sources
free-market principles
market value
government budgets
public funds
public perception
value generation
bureaucratic
consumer spending
economic implications

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Nowadays celebrities earn more money than politicians. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or negative development?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that foreign visitors should be charged more than locals when they visit cultural and tourist attractions in a country. To what extent do you agree with this view?

In many places, people’s lifestyles are changing rapidly, and this aﬀects family relationships. Do you think the advantages of such developments outweigh the disadvantages?

Some feel that it is impossible for a country to be economically progressive and environmentally friendly at the same time. Others disagree with this view. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Both government and individual are spending vast amount of money protecting animals and their habitats. This money could be better spent dealing with fundamental issues in society such as poverty and healthcare. To what extent do you agree or disagree?