Bullying is a big problem in many schools. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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As
a
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apply
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new
student
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students
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, some pupils
aware
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are aware
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and
curios
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curious
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about whether they can be accepted very well by their friends or maybe they can be
an
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apply
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isolated
person
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people
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without any mates.
This
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frightened brings up an issue of what we described as
a
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apply
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bullying.
Such
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phenomenon
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a phenomenon
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become a serious problem that needs to be prevented by all the elements.
This
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essay will explain a detailed reason why
this
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issue happened including
recommendation
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a recommendation
the recommendation
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to tackle it.
To begin
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with, it is undeniable that bullying will still be
the
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a
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scary story for most
students
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if they
are
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apply
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enter a new
school
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after graduating.
This
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occurred because
of
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apply
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a perpetrator
feel
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felt
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the same way- that they got
an
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apply
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intimidation by their senior. To amplify
this
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,
students
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comment
a
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apply
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negative
word
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words
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to
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on
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their
colleague’s
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colleagues’
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social media to express their pathetic moments, so it can bring
a
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apply
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satisfaction.
On the other hand
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,
this
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problem can be tackled seamlessly if all the
school
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elements take
a
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apply
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part
of
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in
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this
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situation. Head
school
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as the highest position with
the
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a
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powerful impact on the
school
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regulation can consider
to create
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creating
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a bullying punishment applied for all
students
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.
For instance
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, the perpetrator
need
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needs
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to get a sanction, like points or get
a dedication assignments
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dedication assignments
a dedication assignment
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to take care of the
school
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facilities. Eventually,
this
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policy will help to minimise the inclination of bullying at the
school
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.
Furthermore
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, consultation with teachers
assist
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assists
show examples
them with various solution if they
had
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have
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overcome
the
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apply
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personal issue. In conclusion,
this
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essay depicts that bullying is one of the
school
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violations that can
appears
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appear
show examples
because of mental pressure
came
Verb problem
apply
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from the perpetrator, but it
also
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can be measured with
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school’s
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the school’s
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sanction to deter
students
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.
Submitted by Salsabilakurnianingtyas on

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coherence cohesion
The essay has a logical structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, transitions between ideas could be improved for better flow. Additionally, some main points are not fully developed or supported with clear examples or explanations which affects the coherence of the essay.
task achievement
The task is addressed, though not all parts are covered equally and the solutions and causes are not entirely clear or fully developed. Include more specific examples and explanations to illustrate points. Ensure that the essay directly addresses all components of the task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Bullying
  • Harassment
  • Intimidation
  • Diversity
  • Adolescent
  • Mimic
  • Aggressive behavior
  • Cyberbullying
  • Peer pressure
  • Social acceptance
  • Awareness
  • Conflict resolution
  • Peer mediation
  • Consequences
  • Respect
  • Kindness
  • Open communication
  • Vulnerable
  • Buddy system
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