with the rise of e books comes the decline in paper books.Some people see this as a good step forward while others do not what are the benefits and drawbacks of this trend?

Nowadays , many
people
araund
Correct your spelling
around
the world are using e-
books
instead
of paper
books
and
this
trend declines
using
Replace the word
use
show examples
of traditional
books
.
This
essay will suggest that using e-
books
is more comfortable and it has a bad influence on
people
's
eyes
who are using it. Reading
books
is one of the popular hobbies among
people
.
People
who are reading many
book
Change to a plural noun
books
show examples
have broad
worldview
Fix the agreement mistake
worldviews
show examples
and wasting your time with
books
can bring
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
you cognitive benefits. Reading
books
is not comfortable everywhere and you can not carry many
books
with you
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
is why reading
ebooks
is more comfortable than normal
books
.because you can read
numereous
Correct your spelling
numerous
books
on your device and you can read everywhere.
For
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
you can read your favourite book
while
you are walking or you can
reading
Wrong verb form
read
show examples
while
your other hand is
donig
Correct your spelling
doing
something else. Despite these
advantages
Add a comma
advantages,
show examples
ebooks
have
bad
Correct article usage
a bad
show examples
impact on
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
eyes
.Because they are working with electricity.
That is
why these devices have radiation.
This
radiation can be very harmful to
people
's
eyes
and after
long
Change the article
a long
show examples
time using can weaken them.
Eyese
Correct your spelling
Eyes
are very sensitive organs and they are one of the functional parts of
person
Add an article
a person
the person
show examples
.Bad influence on them is the worst drawback of
usig
Correct your spelling
using
ebooks
.
for
Capitalize word
For
show examples
example a survey by the USA doctors found that 34% of ebook readers have
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
with their
eyese
Correct your spelling
eyes
. In summing up, using
ebooks
is handy for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
but it has
bad
Add an article
a bad
show examples
impact on your
eyes
and it can make you blind
Submitted by ismayilovisgender25 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay presents a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which is positive; however, it lacks a clear and cohesive progression of ideas. Introduction and conclusion are too simplistic and need to be further developed to effectively set up and summarize the argument.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to use clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to establish the main idea, followed by supporting details. Maintain logical and clear paragraphing with appropriate use of linking words to enhance the flow of your essay.
task achievement
The response addresses the prompt, but it doesn't fully develop the benefits and drawbacks of the trend. Include a more balanced discussion and provide more elaborate examples to support each point. Additionally, do not introduce new arguments in the conclusion. Stick to summarizing what has already been presented.
task achievement
The ideas presented are relevant, but the lack of clarity and explanation undermines the comprehensiveness. Expand on the points made, aim for deeper analysis, and avoid vague statements. Work on presenting clear, well-thought-out ideas.
task achievement
The example provided about the survey by the USA doctors is relevant but lacks detail and a source. Future examples should be more specific, with clear references to studies or sources to improve credibility.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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