Living much longer in the future will be of great benefit to everyone To what extent do you agree with this statement.

The discussion of long longevity hereafter is surely one that begs the question of exactly how it could be fruitful to the present world. Conspicuously, in my opinion,
due to
being the family's pillar and dictionary to cultural knowledge for others, asserting that
such
a situation is completely justifiable. There are many reasons why old member could overwhelmingly strengthen and boosts the root of the family. One reason comes from unity, which comes to mind when the existence of
such
age groups in the home is brought into discussion. They would be the best plausible guide to any problem
due to
their uniqueness in nature. Take
for instance
, they are well-known for holding the fort together by providing invaluable moral support whenever family look for them.
Therefore
, if analyzed properly, there is no argument for the fact that living longer could indeed be only a resort to
overall
strength and one feels satiated having them.
Furthermore
, it is argued that senior people are seen as sources for a plethora of family cultures and skills. The argument stems from the scenario that on every occasion, whether it is a festival or function, we look for the humungous cultural knowledge they acquire to make it a top-notch success.
This
resembles when we encounter ,almost in each family function, the presence of
such
people guiding everyone on how to do something.
For example
, conducting a ceremony successfully is directly proportional to guidance showered via them.
Overall
, given these influential outcomes on family growth, they ought to be more in the limelight.
To conclude
, both sides present a paradox;
nonetheless
, I still stand firm on my opinion that a higher survival rate would be appropriate on a larger scale as it paves the way for family togetherness and the bible to ostensible ancestor's culture and skills.
Submitted by suresh.sssingh.singh984 on

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Task Achievement
Task Achievement: Ensure that the essay addresses all parts of the prompt in a balanced manner. While the essay agrees with the statement, it could benefit from discussing potential downsides of living longer for a more rounded argument. Include specific and varied examples to substantiate the points raised.
Coherence and Cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: Use a range of cohesive devices and paragraphing to create clearer connections between ideas. Some sentences could have been more explicit in leading the reader through the essay's line of reasoning. Use topic sentences to lead paragraphs and make sure every sentence contributes to the development of the topic.

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