Some people think that parents should teach their children to be good members of society However, others believe School is the best place to learn this. Discuss both the view and give your opinion.

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Few individuals believe that
parents
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should teach their children to become better
members
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of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society
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. But, others think the best place to learn about
this
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is at
academy
Add an article
the academy
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.
Although
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Correct article usage
the later
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later
Correct your spelling
latter
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notion can be beneficial,
but
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apply
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in my opinion
parents
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should teach their children to become good
citizens
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institute is a good area to learn how to become good
members
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of a community.
This
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means there are teachers who know about
society
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more than their students, which helps to guide them and helps them to become
a better
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a better member
better members
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members
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in
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of
show examples
society
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.
For example
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, In the USA, a school has started teaching about
society
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to their students which helps them to become good
citizens
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in future.
Thus
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, school is one of the best places to learn and become a good
society
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member. I
beleive
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believe
parent should tutor their
kids
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to become better
citizens
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because
parents
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know their
kids
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better than anyone in the world and
also
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they know their community than any other random people. It means that
parents
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know their children since their birth and they know their every behaviour and activity.
Also
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, they know about their
society
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more than other people people from different societies like teachers and other
members
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from different societies.
For instance
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, in
UK
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the UK
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,
parents
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started teaching their
kids
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what
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apply
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are positive and negative things about their
society
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.
This
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may help a lot
Change preposition
of
show examples
Change preposition
of
show examples
kids
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to become better
citizens
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in
Correct article usage
the coming
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coming
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the coming
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days.
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Capitalize word
Therefore
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therefore
Capitalize word
Therefore
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,
parents
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are better teachers for their sons and daughters to become good
members
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of the community. In conclusion,
Although
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school can be a good place for
kids
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to learn and become good
society
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members
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. But, I believe
parents
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are the best tutors for
kids
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to become better
citizens
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.
Submitted by anushabhujel37 on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay contains a basic structure with an introduction and a conclusion. However, it is essential to develop your paragraphs more effectively, ensuring that each main point is elaborated upon with sufficient detail. Paragraphing and proper signposting are required to guide the reader through your ideas with clarity.
task achievement
While you have addressed the task and provided an opinion, the response could be more comprehensive by fully exploring both sides of the argument. Develop specific, detailed examples to strengthen your arguments. It is also necessary to provide a balanced discussion before articulating your own view.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • good members of society
  • teach
  • parents
  • schools
  • responsibility
  • values
  • respect
  • empathy
  • responsibility
  • formal education
  • citizenship
  • ethics
  • social responsibility
  • lead by example
  • role models
  • conducive environment
  • extracurricular activities
  • community involvement
  • collaborate
  • holistic approach
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