Model Answer: More companies produce goods in the factories located in different countries other than the location of the head office. Advantages and disadvantages?

#model #companies #goods #factories #countries #location #head #office

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Due to

Linking Words

developmental equity as a part of

worldwide

Correct article usage

a worldwide

show examples

program, many

companies

Use synonyms

builds

Change the verb form

build

show examples

their manufactures in third

nations

Use synonyms

while

Linking Words

their headquarters are in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

developed

countries

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

program has some advantages and disadvantages, not only

developing

Change preposition

in developing

show examples

countries

Use synonyms

but

also

Linking Words

developed

Change preposition

in developed

show examples

nations

Use synonyms

. I

wil

Correct your spelling

will

explain the pros and cons in the next following paragraphs.

To begin

Linking Words

with, there are a lot of big

companies

Use synonyms

builds

Wrong verb form

building

show examples

their factories in different

countries

Use synonyms

. Mostly, they want to reduce the salary of

labours

Correct your spelling

labourers

show examples

. Many developing

countries

Use synonyms

have a bad policy for their citizens who work as a labourer than people who live in developed

countries

Use synonyms

. Because of

this

Linking Words

, big

companies

Use synonyms

prefer

located

Change the verb form

to locate

show examples

their factories in third

nations

Use synonyms

. Indeed,

this

Linking Words

idea brings various adverse effects for labourers. As I

mention

Change the form of the verb

mentioned

show examples

before, they will earn less income than they should.

In addition

Linking Words

, some factories have a lower standard of buildings.

For example

Linking Words

, in 2015, there was an accident in India where the building was

collapse

Wrong verb form

collapsed

show examples

and many of them

was

Change the verb form

were

show examples

dead because of

this

Linking Words

traged

Correct your spelling

tragedy

. In spite of taking responsibility, the company seemed

Fix the infinitive

to close

show examples

their eyes.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, the employees will obtain the disadvantages,

while

Linking Words

the employers will acquire profits. In

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

contrast,

this

Linking Words

idea

also

Linking Words

brings

Verb problem

has

show examples

a positive impact

for

Change preposition

show examples

individuals who settle in developing

countries

Use synonyms

Firstly

Linking Words

, it will increase their

countries

Use synonyms

' GDP

annualy

Correct your spelling

annually

Secondly

Linking Words

, it will open many job opportunities. As I know, most of their workers

Change the verb form

are

show examples

women who have a child. Of course, these women have an opportunity to employ and support their

family

Fix the agreement mistake

families

show examples

. In

conlusion

Correct your spelling

conclusion

, there are many advantages and disadvantages related to building a factory in other

countries

Use synonyms

, especially third

nations

Use synonyms

. Most of

advantages

Add an article

the advantages

show examples

gains

Wrong verb form

gained

show examples

companies

Use synonyms

than workers.

However

Linking Words

, the important thing is

companies

Use synonyms

have to consider the worker's well-being than profits.

Submitted by heidynilasari02 on Thu Dec 14 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Be sure to address the task directly and consistently, focusing on answering the question with clear main points and fully developed arguments.

coherence cohesion

It's crucial to organize ideas logically, ensuring that paragraphs are well-structured with clear topic sentences and supporting details.

coherence cohesion

Predominantly use a range of cohesive devices appropriately. However, ensure that they do not distract from the clarity of the argument.

task achievement

Provide a balanced analysis of the advantages and disadvantages by offering clear examples that truly illustrate the points and contribute to the reader's understanding of the topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

292 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
In some countries, governments are encouraging industries and businesses to move out of large cities and into regional areas. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh its disadvantages?
In recent years, the government have been encouraging businesses and industries to relocate from major city to small regional. As such, there are merits and demerits to this idea, although I opine that its merits outweight the demerits. In this essay, I eill examine all the relevant opinions based on factual premises.
6
band
The exploration and development of safe alternatives to fossil fuels should be the most important global priority today. To what extend do you agree and disagree.
We currently rely on fossil fuels to provide the energy that allows our economy to continue to grow and people to thrive. This essay also agrees with this initiative because it’s a safer alternative to carbon-based energy and greener engineers are needed to develop it.
5.5
band
Some people think that one of the best ways to solve environment problems is to increase the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles. Do you agree or disagree.
It is true that an increasing number of students are motivated to study computer-based technical subjects rather than studying science in their academic life. While there are variety of factors responsible for this ,I believe that this is a positive change.
9
band
2.It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year off between finishing school and going university. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?
Taking a gap year off between finishing school and starting university has gained popularity in recent years. Moreover, the trend comes with several pros and cons worth considering. In my opinion, I believe that the benefit for students is to grow their personal development and career exploration, however, there are some detriments due to this delay that may impact study habits and affect long-term career goals.
6
band
Stress related illness are becoming increasingly common. What do you think are the causes of this. What is solution can you suggest?
In this contemporary era, stress is a part of everyone's activity. However, some masses say that stress is growing rapidly day by day in human beings. This essay not only discusses the problem but gives the solution to how to reduce stress.

Model Answer: More companies produce goods in the factories located in different countries other than the location of the head office. Advantages and disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In some countries, governments are encouraging industries and businesses to move out of large cities and into regional areas. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh its disadvantages?

The exploration and development of safe alternatives to fossil fuels should be the most important global priority today. To what extend do you agree and disagree.

Some people think that one of the best ways to solve environment problems is to increase the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles. Do you agree or disagree.

2.It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year off between finishing school and going university. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

Stress related illness are becoming increasingly common. What do you think are the causes of this. What is solution can you suggest?