IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Large shopping malls are replacing small shops. Do you think it is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

#malls #shops #development
In recent number jem, there has been
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 incensing
ne
Correct your spelling
new
 mall bilt, leading of small
shops
. In my
opiniod
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opinion
,
this
 essay change
bring
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brings
show examples
 both positive Tempoet, though they have and negative, have
more
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a more
show examples
 negative impact in
long
Correct article usage
the long
show examples
 term
..
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.
...
show examples
 On the one hand, the number of Shopping
mall
Fix the agreement mistake
malls
show examples
 offered a wide range of benefits to the
custorners
Correct your spelling
customers
.
Firstly
,
people
con
Correct your spelling
can
show examples
 Save nous time shopping by lolated rated many types Complen.
Shopfind
Correct your spelling
Shop find
 on Shop in one
malls
Change to a singular noun
mall
show examples
provide
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provides
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 all the groceries,
clony
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colony
, co Home appliance in best offers under the one roof. The customers can save the ir Valuable time and they do
mit
Correct your spelling
not
hove
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have
show examples
 to run in different small
Shops
.
Secondly
, Malls provide a discount and sales to their
consume
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consumers
show examples
 for their benefit,
Futhermore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
,
amall
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many
Shops
 cannot
pobvide
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provide
 Safe parking fac facilities Customer to their
Convinent
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convenience
, and Safety
As a result
, more and more
people
 choose to go
malls
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to malls
show examples
, leading to
decrease
Correct article usage
a decrease
show examples
of
Change preposition
in of
show examples
 purchasing goals from seperate Shop.
On the other hand
, a number of benefits to
people
bay
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by
show examples
 shopping in Dne is they are Smaller
can
Correct word choice
and can
show examples
 give. are locally produced and. family yun business. They are
friendly
Correct quantifier usage
more friendly
show examples
 and bumble to their
consuchers
Correct your spelling
consumers
 than
large
Add an article
the large
a large
show examples
mall
Fix the agreement mistake
malls
show examples
 and Chain
Store
Fix the agreement mistake
Stores
show examples
.
Nent
Correct your spelling
Next
 is
small
Correct article usage
a small
show examples
 store
provide
Correct pronoun usage
that provide
show examples
 employment, profits and income to local
people
 Small oll
Shops
 and vendor
give
Verb problem
allow
show examples
 them to
sales
Replace the word
sell
show examples
 their locally-Dioned SAFES in
market
Add an article
the market
show examples
 and can
Correct your spelling
read
earn
eard
Correct your spelling
earn
 little wealth and communities In Conclusion, It has both a positive and negative development that impact the lives of common
people
 and shirty-
Hence
, it is good to have a big mal
as well as
goodmall
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
a small shop
due
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
to its influence on the pecuning growth in Society.
Submitted by chaudharysabin782 on

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Language Proficiency
Iron out inconsistent and incorrect language usage. Maintain a high level of grammatical accuracy with sentence structures and vocabulary choice.
Task Achievement
Clarify and expand upon the main ideas with more focused and developed arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay should have a clear logical flow. Ideas must be organized and transitions should be smooth to guide the reader seamlessly from one point to the next.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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