some people studying the past is the best way to help young people function well in the modern world. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures could be effective in helping young people to function well in the modern world?
some people believe that studying history is the best way for the youth to
dealing
with our new modern Wrong verb form
deal
world
. in my opinion
studying the past is just like reading stories or tails that may Add a comma
opinion,
includes
some good and beneficial ideas for Change the verb form
include
young
generation. I think there are a Correct article usage
the young
numbure
of knowledges and Correct your spelling
number
skilles
that they are necessary for adolescents to learn. Correct your spelling
skills
For instance
, social cominucation
and computer science Correct your spelling
communication
is
crucial for youth to know.
Change the verb form
are
although
history is tought
to Correct your spelling
taught
thought
young
generation in Add an article
the young
Correct article usage
the edjucational
edjucational
system, it is just Correct your spelling
educational
story telling
about individuals and events in the past with Correct your spelling
storytelling
lack
of analysis and useful information about their mistakes and Correct article usage
a lack
consiquences
. Correct your spelling
consequences
Nevertheless
Add a comma
Nevertheless,
these
kind of Correct determiner usage
this
knowledges
Change the wording
knowledge
pieces of knowledge
bits of knowledge
are
necessary Correct subject-verb agreement
is
to known
for adolescents, but not just the best method to Verb problem
apply
preparing
for Wrong verb form
prepare
live
in the modern Replace the word
life
world
for now and future.
On the other hand
, there are a bunch of bugs about historical contents, such
as lack of unity opinion
about some events, reality had been changed Change preposition
in opinion
trough
the years, and the paramount one is that Correct your spelling
through
the
history is written by Correct article usage
apply
victorians
, not by honest historians.
I think one of the best ways Change the capitalization
Victorians
for developing
young people in terms of dealing with new modern Change preposition
to develop
world
issues is learning how to use computer
, Fix the agreement mistake
computers
internet
and smart devices. Nowadays these devices Correct article usage
the internet
could
help in every single daily Wrong verb form
can
tasks
and they play Change to a singular noun
task
crucial
role in our lives. Add an article
a crucial
On the other hand
these days our world
is just like a big village and it is so important to know, how to cominucate
with other people as Correct your spelling
communicate
i
think Change the capitalization
I
every body
Correct your spelling
everybody
especialy
Correct your spelling
especially
young
generation must learn these Correct article usage
the young
kind
o skills.
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
to sum up
, for adolescents
it is important to know what Add a comma
adolescents,
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
happend
in the past, but they can not Correct your spelling
happened
have
act like them in facing issues Unnecessary verb
apply
for dealing
with in Change preposition
to deal
this
new face modern world
. they should develope
Correct your spelling
develop
themselvs
every day.Correct your spelling
themselves
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coherence cohesion
It is essential that your essay maintains a clear and logical structure throughout, ensuring that each paragraph centers on one main idea and that these ideas progress logically from one to the other. This essay lacked clear transitions and cohesive devices, making it difficult to follow the progression of your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion should clearly state your position regarding the topic and succinctly summarize the main points of the essay. This essay had an unclear introduction and a weak conclusion which did not fully encapsulate the main points or your stance
coherence cohesion
Make certain that each main point of your argument is well supported by specific evidence or examples. This essay included some general points without the necessary examples or evidence to back them up, weakening the overall argument.
task achievement
Ensure that you address the essay prompt completely, answering all aspects of the question. The essay did not thoroughly address the extent to which you agree or disagree with the prompt, nor did it satisfactorily elaborate on other effective measures beyond the need for computer literacy.
task achievement
Your ideas should be clearly stated and extensively developed throughout the essay. There should be a sense of depth and comprehension in the way you explore the prompt. This essay presented its ideas superficially, without the necessary depth and development to convey a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Using relevant and specific examples can greatly enhance your argument, making it more convincing. This essay would benefit from a range of concrete examples to support the points made, especially when discussing the modern skills young people need.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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