Now adays the population of young people is more than old people in the countries. And it benefit us To what extent do you agree or disagree?
These days the population of youngsters is increased than senior citizens . in the
nation
some people Add a comma
nation,
believes
that Change the verb form
believe
new
generation Correct article usage
the new
have
Change the verb form
has
more
positive impact on society . I completely agree with Add an article
a more
this
statement
Linking Words
To begin
with , Linking Words
the
young people are more Correct article usage
apply
usefull
to Correct your spelling
useful
the
society Correct article usage
apply
to
explicate , because they have a great knowledge about the things happening in the world Fix the infinitive
apply
due to
the Linking Words
Morden
technologies , on Correct your spelling
modern
other
side they are more helpful to Correct article usage
the other
sarounders
they open Correct your spelling
around
welfares
help Fix the agreement mistake
welfare
peoples
more than old once they help regards to medical treatments. Take a Fix the agreement mistake
people
Change the capitalization
Phonix
phonix
association as Change the capitalization
Phonix
a
example they help a lot of peoples , providing food and other medical facilities during the Change the article
an
Covid 19
pandemic Add a hyphen
Covid-19
on the other hand
young people can give a good economy to the country Linking Words
due to
increasing technology and knowledge , Linking Words
now a days
everyone Correct the word
nowadays
give
Change the verb form
gives
a
first preference to studies every which will help in increasing the GDP of the country if any country wants to grow there economy growth they should use a young brain
Correct article usage
apply
On the other hand
, it has a negative influence as well , as we are all Linking Words
well connected
to our parents they always Add a hyphen
well-connected
gives
us Change the verb form
give
a
life lessons so that we can achieve Correct article usage
apply
a
great things in life . Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
Linking Words
Moreover
if we need any advice we take from them , the Add a comma
Moreover,
Correct your spelling
benefits
benifits
of older age Correct your spelling
benefits
is
limited
In Correct subject-verb agreement
are
conclusion
I conclude that the positive of older age is limitedAdd a comma
conclusion,
, .
I believe the younger population create a great impact on Change the punctuation
,
.
economy
Add an article
the economy
Submitted by dayyanjkhan03 on
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structure
The essay lacks a clear structure that safely guides the reader from introduction to conclusion. Consider organizing your essay into clear paragraphs, each with a distinct idea that builds upon the previous one.
introduction/conclusion
The presence of an introduction and conclusion is noted, but these sections need to be more defined and clear. They should respectively set the stage for the discussion and summarize the main points effectively.
support
The main points outlined in the essay require further support through relevant, detailed examples or data. Aim to develop your arguments more fully with specific illustrations to strengthen your position.
completion
A more complete response to the task is needed that covers all aspects of the topic. The essay should directly address the prompt by providing a thorough argument, weighing both the benefits and drawbacks of a youthful population.
clarity
The essay should consistently express comprehensive ideas clearly and coherently. Strive for precision in your language choice and sentence construction to avoid ambiguity or confusion.
relevance
The use of specific examples is crucial for illustrating your points. Ensure that the examples you provide are directly relevant to the topic and persuasive enough to support your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.