Many people like to eat unhealthy food even though they know it's bad for them. Why is this? What is an effective way to improve people's healthy eating habits?

In the contemporary era, it is easy to accept that
junk
foods
are bad for their health.
However
, the influence of
this
truth
doesn't
Verb problem
isn't
show examples
strong enough to prevent
people
from eating unhealthy
foods
. In my opinion, there are a variety of reasons for
this
phenomenon, but it can
be solve
Change the verb form
be solved
show examples
by
reduce
Change the verb form
reducing
show examples
the
popular
Replace the word
popularity
show examples
of
junk
foods
. On the one hand, finance is the first thing that comes to mind when
people
buy
foods
Fix the agreement mistake
food
show examples
.
Junk
Cuisine not only
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
a reasonable
prince
Correct your spelling
price
show examples
but
also
taste
Correct subject-verb agreement
tastes
show examples
delicious.
For example
, overseas students find it is cheaper to buy a hamburger which include all nutritious from meat and salad,.. than buy some vegetable, fruit and meat to
made
Change the form of the verb
make
show examples
a nutritious meal.
Also
, some
people
find plenty of happiness,
fulfillment
Correct word choice
and fulfillment
show examples
and even relieve their stress from eating unsound
foods
. The most effective solution for
this
situation is government should enhance education on the
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
show examples
of
eating
Verb problem
apply
show examples
eating nutritious foodstuff through social media,
billboard
Fix the agreement mistake
billboards
show examples
,
Correct word choice
and newspaper
show examples
newspaper
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newspapers
show examples
,...
Beside
Correct your spelling
Besides
show examples
improve
Wrong verb form
improving
show examples
public awareness, each
individuals
Change to a singular noun
individual
show examples
should have a healthy plan like
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
regular exercise,
a
Correct word choice
and a
show examples
healthy meal. There are numerous videos which teach the audience how to cook healthy food in a delicious and much-saving way.
To sum up
, the reasons why most
people
prefer to eat
junk
food in spite of its damage to the human body are because of its
flavors
Change the spelling
flavours
show examples
and expense.
Nevertheless
, the problem can
be reduce
Change the verb form
be reduced
show examples
by
improve
Wrong verb form
improving
show examples
the public awareness of health and motivating fellows to make changes in diet.
Submitted by nguyentrantuquyen14 on

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Coherence & Cohesion
Your essay lacks a clear and logical structure. Ideas are presented in a haphazard manner, and the flow between them is not smooth. Work on creating a coherent essay by outlining your main points and structuring your paragraphs in a logical order.
Coherence & Cohesion
You did include an introduction and conclusion, but they need to be clearer and more concise. The conclusion should effectively summarize the main points of the essay without introducing new ideas.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your main points were somewhat supported, but you need to develop your arguments more fully with detailed examples and explanations. Each paragraph should focus on a single idea with supporting details.
Task Achievement
You only partially addressed the task. You should provide a more detailed analysis of the reasons behind unhealthy eating habits and offer more concrete and developed solutions.
Task Achievement
Your ideas need to be expressed more clearly. Employ a range of sentence structures and precise vocabulary to articulate your thoughts more effectively.
Task Achievement
Specific examples to illustrate your points are essential but were lacking in your essay. Use real-world examples and data to strengthen your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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