Some people think that wild animals should not be kept in zoos. Athers believes that there are good reasons for having zoos. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

One of the most discussed issues nowadays is keeping
animals
in
zoos
. It is undeniable that
animals
become
essential
Add an article
an essential
show examples
part of our life including pets and zoo parks. But there is
not
Correct your spelling
no
show examples
absolute agreement on whether good idea that
animals
kept
Verb problem
apply
show examples
in
zoos
or not. I think
this
essay will lead to
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
logical deduction. Commonly held belief that wild
animal's
Change noun form
animal
show examples
particularly
cornivorouse's
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cornivorouse
show examples
habitate in liberty and in places where hasn'
t
human
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humans
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.
People
sometimes were
greed
Replace the word
greedy
show examples
and
this
lead
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led
show examples
to the craziest things. Given that they hunt in order to take them and show them
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
the public and get money. Like
evidence
Add a comma
evidence,
show examples
many
zoos
around the world can support
this
.
Furthermore
, wild
animals
which
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
love liberty and family
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
their real
habitate
Correct your spelling
habitat
sealed
Add a missing verb
are sealed
show examples
at
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
zoos
and
like
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apply
show examples
prison
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prisons
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can'
t
leave.
On the other hand
, some
people
claim that in
zoos
they would be happy, given that there are
people
who can treat them when they
ill
Add a missing verb
are ill
show examples
and give them
meal
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meals
show examples
when they
hungry
Add a missing verb
are hungry
show examples
.
Moreover
, they
tell
Verb problem
say
show examples
that
people
there protect
animals
which live hazardous in
wild
Add an article
a wild
show examples
place
Fix the agreement mistake
places
show examples
and they help preserve species which might
ectinct
Correct your spelling
extinct
in
near
Correct article usage
the near
show examples
future. All of
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
factors lead to the opinion that
zoos
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
the best
place
where wild
animals
could
Wrong verb form
can
show examples
live. But I think differently. In conclusion, taking all
Correct article usage
the informations
show examples
informations
Change the wording
information
pieces of information
show examples
mentioned previously I argue that zoo parks are not
such
a good
place
for wild
animals
. I accept that there
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
very good conditions like treatment and meals. But I think that all of
this
information
just
Add a missing verb
is just
show examples
words which cover big
crime
Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
show examples
provided with
animals
. God
create
Wrong verb form
created
show examples
wild
animals
like liberty organisms. They can'
t
stay just in one
place
and see
people
that come.
This
life could lead
the
Correct your spelling
them
show examples
to the void in their heart and stress. They slowly but truly suffer and
will
Verb problem
apply
show examples
won'
t
live.
Submitted by aikumarbekarys on

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coherence cohesion
To improve your essay's coherence, ensure there is a clear logical flow of ideas. Your essay should start with an introduction, followed by body paragraphs that each discuss a single main point, and end with a conclusion that summarizes your arguments and states your opinion. Use a range of cohesive devices to connect ideas within and across sentences.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion should clearly introduce and summarise the topic, respectively, while including a restatement of the question and your opinion. Make sure your introduction sets the stage for the discussion and your conclusion wraps up the essay effectively.
coherence cohesion
Support your main points with clear explanations, developed ideas, and relevant examples. Each paragraph should address a unique aspect of the argument, ensuring that your essay provides a comprehensive response to the question. Develop these ideas fully for better demonstration of your understanding.
task achievement
To fully address the task, it is important to discuss both sides of the argument as the question dictates, and to provide a clear personal opinion. Make sure to complete each aspect, giving balanced treatment to both points of view before offering your own well-reasoned perspective.
task achievement
Your ideas should be clearly expressed, comprehensible, and detailed. Be precise in your language use and ensure your arguments are fully fleshed out. Each paragraph should be organized around a single main idea or point of view, which contributes to a complete understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Use specific examples to illustrate your points and make your argument more convincing. These examples should be directly relevant to the question and well-integrated into your discussion, contributing to a more effective and detailed task response.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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