in some countries levels of health and fitness are decreasing and average weight are inreasing. what o you think are the causes of these problems and what are some possible solutions?

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Nowadays, many
people
Use synonyms
choose
junk
Use synonyms
food
Use synonyms
as their daily diet
Linking Words
whereas
Correct word choice
because
show examples
it treats their
health
Use synonyms
conditions. The sophisticated technology
also
Linking Words
makes
people
Use synonyms
lack
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
movements
Fix the agreement mistake
movement
show examples
because they can order online
transportations
Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
show examples
directly from home to
office
Correct article usage
the office
show examples
. I believe those conditions can be tackled by increasing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
junk
Use synonyms
food
Use synonyms
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
and applying
free-emission
Correct your spelling
free emission
show examples
on special days.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
tend to consume
junk
Use synonyms
food
Use synonyms
because they are busy, so they decide to look
simple
Change preposition
at simple
show examples
food
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
diet has
high
Change the article
a high
the high
show examples
number of fat and carbohydrate which is zero proteins and vitamins
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
. If we eat that in our daily diet, it would be burned in our
body
Use synonyms
and
built
Wrong verb form
build
show examples
a "bad fat", leading
obesity
Change preposition
to obesity
show examples
, diabetes, or blood lipid disorders.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
people'
Change noun form
people's
show examples
Use synonyms
body
Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
show examples
need equivalent vitamins and proteins to keep healthy. I consider that
rising
Correct your spelling
raising
show examples
50
Correct article usage
the 50
show examples
% of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
junk
Use synonyms
food
Use synonyms
price is the best strategy to reduce
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
health
Use synonyms
problems.
This
Linking Words
is because
people
Use synonyms
would be considering twice before they buy it, leading them to consume natural
food
Use synonyms
at home.
In addition
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
solution is effective
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
decreasing
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
health
Use synonyms
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
among students
due to
Linking Words
less
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
money.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of
body
Use synonyms
movements drives
people
Use synonyms
gaining
Change the verb form
to gain
show examples
weight more
easy
Change the word
easily
show examples
than active
people
Use synonyms
. It happens because advanced technologies influence
Use synonyms
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
show examples
through using
transportations
Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
show examples
at
presents
Fix the agreement mistake
present
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
,
there
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
is common
among
Change preposition
for
show examples
adults or teenagers
for ordering
Change preposition
to order
show examples
taxi
Fix the agreement mistake
taxis
show examples
online from their
house
Fix the agreement mistake
houses
show examples
to
works
Wrong verb form
work
show examples
or
studies
Replace the word
study
show examples
.
Comparing
Wrong verb form
Compared
show examples
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
the past,
people
Use synonyms
must
Wrong verb form
had to
show examples
walk more than 15 minutes to reach train or bus stations which
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
good for
practice
Wrong verb form
practising
show examples
their
body
Use synonyms
muscles.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I believe that companies or schools should make some regulations towards free emission days
such
Linking Words
as on every first date every month, making them
should
Verb problem
apply
show examples
walk
minimum
Correct article usage
a minimum
show examples
10
Change preposition
of 10
show examples
minutes. In conclusion,
continuity
Replace the word
continuous
show examples
eating
junk
Use synonyms
food
Use synonyms
and lack of
body
Use synonyms
movements causes
people
Use synonyms
’s weight easily, making their
health
Use synonyms
condition slowly drop. Indeed,
that
Correct determiner usage
those
show examples
conditions can be solved with
rising
Correct article usage
the rising
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
junk
Use synonyms
food
Use synonyms
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
and implementing free emission days
every
Change preposition
on every
show examples
fist
Correct your spelling
first
show examples
date.
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Coherence & Cohesion
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Task Achievement
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Task Achievement
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Task Achievement
- Include more relevant and specific examples to support the ideas. The use of examples is good; however, including a greater variety of specific and relevant examples will strengthen the arguments and provide clearer evidence for the points made.

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  • take, for example

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