IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The map below shows the road access to a city hospital in 2007 and 2010.

The map below shows the road access to a city hospital in 2007 and 2010.
#road #access #city
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These maps depict
an information
Remove the article
information
a piece of information
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 about the development
in
Change preposition
of
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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road
Use synonyms
 access to a
city
Use synonyms
 hospital between 2007 and 2010. it is clear from the maps that the
city
Use synonyms
 hospital witnessed significant change to serve many people in the
city
Use synonyms
.
According to
Linking Words
 what is shown, within three years, the hospital experienced various changes
such
Linking Words
 as
roundabout
Add an article
a roundabout
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, public car parking, and bus station. To elaborate, in the south pole of the hospital, the main
city
Use synonyms
road
Use synonyms
 had
edited
Add a missing verb
been edited
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 to contain one roundabout. Along the main hospital
Use synonyms
road
Add a comma
road,
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 the bus parking was demolished and replaced by
bus
Correct article usage
a bus
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 station which gave the employees more parking area in
south eastern
Correct your spelling
southeastern
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 the hospital.
In addition
Linking Words
, the hospital
road
Use synonyms
developed
Add a missing verb
was developed
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 to have one roundabout rather than
Add an article
the cross
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cross
Correct your spelling
crossroad
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road
Use synonyms
 which
make
Wrong verb form
made
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 it easier to turn back and provided a wide bath for buses. The significant change was in the east side of the ring
road
Use synonyms
, people had a wide area to park in and closer to the hospital.
To sum up
Linking Words
, we could say that the hospital had convenient transport in and out
from
Change preposition
of
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 it, which
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
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 the capacity of the hospital, including
staffs
Fix the agreement mistake
staff
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 and patients
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words road, city with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.
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