Some people think that it is the responsibility of governments to take care of the environment, while others believe that it is the responsibility of people to take care of the environment. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
How to take worth the hassle . In
care
of the environment and who is in charge of taking Use synonyms
care
Use synonyms
Has
been Wrong verb form
of it have
the
arguable Correct article usage
apply
point
from the beginning of Fix the agreement mistake
points
new
century . Add an article
the new
Opponent
of Fix the agreement mistake
Opponents
this
subject support that making Linking Words
progress
Use synonyms
indivually
does not make any noticeable changes and encourage states to Correct your spelling
individually
escale
up and take charge . Others argue that making Correct your spelling
scale
escalate
progress
individuallyUse synonyms
Add a missing verb
is
this
essay . I agree with Linking Words
notion
Add an article
the notion
a notion
as
Correct word choice
that
subject
Correct article usage
the subject
it
should be in Correct pronoun usage
apply
industrial
.
On one hand , supporters who encourage governments are not just random guys . there are graduate persons with great academics . Correct article usage
the industrial
besides
, they have Linking Words
better
understanding Add an article
a better
about
what we are doing with jungles and Change preposition
of
nature
.Use synonyms
furthermore
, They are saying that taking Linking Words
care
of Use synonyms
nature
with just a small effort Use synonyms
are
Change the verb form
is
also
appreciated, Linking Words
on the other
Linking Words
hand
factories pay attention toAdd the comma(s)
hand,
costumers
Correct your spelling
customers
demand
Correct subject-verb agreement
demands
.
Correct your spelling
thus
thus
, not thinking about Linking Words
nature
they just want to make Use synonyms
profit
. Add an article
a profit
Therefore
, they encourage Linking Words
official
to take Fix the agreement mistake
officials
charges
and try to downsize factories and improve restrictions.
Fix the agreement mistake
charge
However
, many people believe with just small efforts Linking Words
such
as recycling and abandoning hunting . We can take Linking Words
care
of Use synonyms
nature
Use synonyms
.
Correct your spelling
Besides
besides
, they believe that companies are Restricted and Linking Words
downsizes
nowadays. today we are at the point Wrong verb form
downsizing
that
there is no need for more Correct word choice
where
restriction
we should focus on making Fix the agreement mistake
restrictions
progress
individually take japan as Use synonyms
as
exampleCorrect your spelling
an
,.
Change the punctuation
,
.
Opponent
of Fix the agreement mistake
Opponents
this
opinion showed us in Linking Words
japan
there is no need for restriction recycling Capitalize word
Japan
are
in the blood of Unnecessary verb
apply
Japanese
.
Correct article usage
the Japanese
To conclude
,I presume that Linking Words
Correct article usage
the goverment
goverment
should take charge because of uncertainty about Correct your spelling
government
factories
production and try to make Change the noun form
factory
progress
for Use synonyms
betterment
of the world . I agree with Add an article
the betterment
this
notion as a subject.Linking Words
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coherence cohesion
Your essay lacks a clear, logical structure which makes it difficult to follow your argument. To improve, ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all supporting sentences relate directly to that main idea. Use linking words effectively to connect ideas and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Additionally, an effective essay should have a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, each serving its purpose. Your introduction needs to clearly state the topic and outline your opinion. The conclusion should summarize the main points and restate your opinion. Try to make these sections clear and distinct to guide the reader through your argument.
task achievement
The response does not fully address all parts of the task. You have discussed both views but the examples and explanations provided are not fully developed, nor always relevant. You are expected to provide a more detailed explanation, with relevant examples that support the main points. Work on fully developing your ideas to meet the requirements of the task.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example