IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Students at schools and universities learn far more by lessons with their teachers compared to other sources (e.g. television, the Internet). Do you agree or disagree?

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Nowadays, technology plays a pivotal role in teaching pupils. Some individuals opine that a teacher's influence is more compared to other origins, like television or the internet. I totally agree with the statement. The main advantage of teachers is the interaction, but other sources are one-directional, where there is no face-to-face communication. The bi-directional process of education,
however
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, helps us to express inner judgment.
Thus
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, a student can easily learn and memorise a thing.
Moreover
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, a supervisor gives the education with practical examples which helps a graduate to relate things to his surroundings.
As a result
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, he can memorize it for a long time, and it helps him to use it in his work life.
In contrast
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, television programmes are designed to consider a specific group that might not relate to other ones.
Thereafter
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, providing an example might not be as effective as an instructor's.
Furthermore
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, the facial expression of both the teacher and the student is important. A lecturer can realise the condition of a scholar as he is observing the pupil. After realising that, they can alter the strategy, which is not possible by other experts.
On the other hand
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, though explicit knowledge is transferable, tacit one is not.
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, television or the internet is unable to transfer
this
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 one.
Therefore
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, to achieve
this
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 kind of teaching, it is mandatory to follow a teacher, as they are trying to involve them in some experiments.
For example
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, in my university life, I learned some practical proficiency about electrical instruments at the lab. It helps me to delve into the size, shape and functions of those devices. It was possible as my teachers helped us to understand accurately. In conclusion, it can be said that other origins might be helpful
whereas
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 teachers are always the best choices for proper study either explicit or tacit.

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task achievement
Ensure a clear thesis statement is provided in the introduction and a summarizing or paraphrasing same thesis in the conclusion to provide a clear stance throughout the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Provide clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph that align with the overall thesis of the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Develop logical paragraphs that each focus on a single main point, supported by specific examples or evidence, to add depth to the argument.
task achievement
The conclusion should effectively summarize the main points of the essay and reaffirm the writer's position. Avoid introducing new arguments in the conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Carefully structure the essay to enhance logic and flow. Use cohesive devices appropriately but avoid overusing them to ensure readability.
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