IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

the map shows developments, which took place in the bookstore between 2000 and now.

the map shows developments, which took place in the bookstore between 2000 and now.
The illustrations reveal changes in a bookstore which have taken place since 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
, the store became much
entertaining
Correct quantifier usage
more entertaining
show examples
,
Linking Words
then
Correct your spelling
than
show examples
 it was in 2000. In 2000, the bookstore was a much boring venue without any entertainment, but during, the next years the bookshop experienced a number of superb changes.The most noticeable alter is occurring
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 a cafe, which was accompanied by replacing
books
Use synonyms
 about cookery, hobbies and art to
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 left side of an entrance. Three tables appeared in a venue, where these
books
Use synonyms
 stood.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, fiction
books
Use synonyms
 on a corner were substituted by non-fiction
books
Use synonyms
.
As a
Linking Words
result
Add a comma
result,
show examples
 quantity of
shelfs
Correct your spelling
shelves
shelf
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the left side of the entrance became
significantally
Correct your spelling
significantly
 more
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
 in 2000.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words books with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • depicts
  • changes
  • occurred
  • transformations
  • developments
  • span
  • visual
  • comparison
  • illustrates
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