IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The Maps compares how the road access to a city hospital developed from 2007 to 2010.

#maps #road #access #city
The Maps compares how the
road
 access to a
city
 hospital developed from 2007 to 2010.
Overall
, the
road
 access to a
city
 hospital has been developed in some
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
. Not only the
road
, but
also
constructionn
Correct your spelling
construction
occured
Correct your spelling
occurred
 in some facilities. Looking in more detail, in 2007,
city
Correct article usage
the city
show examples
 hospital
surrounded
Add a missing verb
was surrounded
show examples
 by three main
road
Change to a plural noun
roads
show examples
,
such
 as: hospital
road
,
city
Correct article usage
a city
show examples
road
 and
ring
Correct article usage
a ring
show examples
road
. which is the hospital was the main access with bus
stop
Fix the agreement mistake
stops
show examples
 in the west and the east along the
road
. two
roundabout
Change to a plural noun
roundabouts
show examples
 has been seen during these 3 years, one located in the south of
city
Correct article usage
the city
show examples
 hospital link to the hospital
road
 and the other one replaced
interjunction
Correct article usage
the interjunction
show examples
 between
hospital
Correct article usage
the hospital
show examples
road
 and
city
Correct article usage
the city
show examples
road
. all the bus stop
allong
Correct your spelling
along
 the hospital
road
 has been demolished, in change bus station built connecting two roundabout
where
Rephrase
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the west hospital
road
. in the east hospital
road
,
old
Add an article
an old
the old
show examples
 car which were for staff and
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
 in 2010 has been specialized
limited
Correct word choice
and limited
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 staff only. in substitute,
new
Correct article usage
a new
show examples
 car park for
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
 built located in the east
accross
Correct your spelling
across
city
 hospital.
Submitted by Muha on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
▼
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
▼
Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
▼
Basic structure: Change the seventh paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words road, city with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "compares" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the seventh paragraph.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: