It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In my opinion, taking
risks
is an inherent part of growth and success, both personally and professionally.
For the personal development aspect, people who take more risks
,
can gain more benefits. Studying can take Remove the comma
apply
risks
, For example
, when I learn diving,
if I am aware of being drunk all the time, I can never enjoy the beautiful view Remove the comma
apply
on
the seabed. Change preposition
of
On the other hand
, building up a relationship with someone also
brings risks
. When I meet someone I'm really interested in, I must ask her out. Only by doing this
, I
have an opportunity to become her boyfriend. If I Add a missing verb
do I
affaird
of being refused, I will never know whether she likes me too.
For career development, Correct your spelling
am afraid
risks
often exist in job
hunting and job
changing. When someone is not satisfied with his current job
, he needs to take risks
to find a new one. However
, if he doesn't take these risks
, he won't take any measures, so that
he must suffer Correct word choice
apply
bad
experience at his current Correct article usage
a bad
job
.
In conclusion, it's necessary for people to take risks
, such
as eating and drinking water. What people must do is control and manage risks
, prevent themselves from too high risks
, and make decisions in the range of what they can handle.Submitted by zhangshen9968 on
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introduction conclusion present
Provide a clear introduction that directly addresses the question, presenting your thesis statement and what the essay will cover. Moreover, a well-defined conclusion that summarizes the key points discussed and restates your position can greatly enhance the essay's effectiveness.
coherent logical structure
Improve your coherence by better organizing the ideas within paragraphs with clear topic sentences and logical progression. Additionally, use a wider range of cohesive devices effectively to create clearer links between ideas, sentences, and paragraphs.
supported main points
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complete response
Be sure to completely address all parts of the task. Provide a balanced argument if required and ensure that your position is clear throughout the essay. Make sure to cover why you believe the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, giving equal treatment to both sides.
clear comprehensive ideas
Strive to expound on your ideas with clear, detailed explanations. Use precise language and vocabulary to express your opinions comprehensively. Ensure that your ideas are not just stated but thoroughly explained and connected back to the question.
relevant specific examples
To support your points, include specific, relevant examples. These examples can be from your own experience or from credible sources, and they should be clearly connected to your arguments. Avoid using generic statements and make your examples as detailed and relevant as possible to the argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.