The graph below gives information about computer possession by households in one European country between 1997 and 2011

The line graph given illustrates how many
computers
a family had in 4 categories, based on the data collected in a European nation during the period of seven years (1997-2011). From an
overall
perspective, the most striking feature is that there is an upward trend of two-computer possession in every home,
while
the opposite is true for no
computers
.
While
one computer ownership held the lion’s share, three or more
computers
accounted for the minuscule share. It is
also
evident that there was a remarkable discrepancy between these kinds of surveyed possessions. Regarding the information pertaining to all four types of ownership, the figure of no computer was devoted at the top-tier place, with a shy of 45% at the starting point, before witnessing a gradual leap to a shade of one-fifth.
Besides
, the statistics for the two
computers
saw an increase of 15% from 9% over the whole period. Interestingly, the number of only one computer remained steadily around 45
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
in seven years. The data for three or more
computers
increased gradually from nearly nothing to 7.5
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
in
Change preposition
during
show examples
the entire time.
Submitted by dothaovy0804 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Replace the words computers with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "gradual" was used 2 times.
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