Some people believe that nowadays we have too many options. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, choosing what we want is a normal thing. Some
people
argue that we live to choose abundant things in Use synonyms
life
. In my opinion, Use synonyms
while
some Linking Words
people
have the right to choose, I agree that others cannot choose what they want because of their non-ideal condition.
Use synonyms
To begin
with, Linking Words
according to
the human rights principle, every person is free to choose their Linking Words
options
. Use synonyms
This
freedom to determine what we want should be applied to a personal's Linking Words
life
and the sense of having the power of choice can give a person autonomy to control their destinies and live their Use synonyms
life
to the fullest. Take Use synonyms
for example
, students who choose their path in the universities tend to have excellent performance throughout their studies rather than students who took courses based on their parents’ pressure. Those high-achievers may perform better because of the support and trust from their families which might Linking Words
also
boost their confidence level in having more sense of responsibility for their own choices. Linking Words
Thus
, every person should live by their own choices to live a better quality of Linking Words
life
.
Use synonyms
On the other hand
, the fact that taking Linking Words
options
is a privilege for some Use synonyms
people
but not for others. Some Use synonyms
people
are incapable of choosing simply because of their family condition or the surroundings they live. In some areas in Indonesia, Use synonyms
for example
, female youngsters have to obey their family's orders and traditions to marry someone at a very young age. Linking Words
As a result
of Linking Words
this
, there have been a growing number of dropouts and low-income families. Linking Words
Moreover
, Linking Words
this
condition might be because they do not have as many resources and Linking Words
options
as fellow citizens who are exposed to more resources and accessibilities. Use synonyms
Therefore
, we must acknowledge that some Linking Words
people
do not have so many Use synonyms
options
and privileges despite certain conditions.
In conclusion, Use synonyms
although
I believe that as human beings we have the right to select what the best for ourselves, from my perspective, in some cases, some Linking Words
people
unfortunately cannot choose their dream Use synonyms
life
as others. The only way to solve Use synonyms
this
problem is to be brave to speak about our thoughts on what is best for ourselves and help those unfortunate Linking Words
people
in need.Use synonyms
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on
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coherence cohesion
Achieving coherence in your essay requires a logical flow of ideas. Use a range of linking words and ensure that paragraphs are well-constructed, each having a clear central idea that is developed and supported throughout the paragraph. While you did use some linking words, greater variety and accuracy are needed for a higher score.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are important components of your essay. They should reflect the main points presented and provide a comprehensive summary of your viewpoint. Ensure that your conclusion effectively summarizes the discussion and reiterates your standpoint clearly.
coherence cohesion
Main points must be supported adequately with explanations and examples. It is essential to develop each point fully to show the depth of your understanding. Aim to provide more details and explanations to reinforce your main points, which in turn can enhance the persuasiveness of your argument.
task achievement
To fully respond to the task, you must address all parts of the prompt comprehensively. Ensure that you extend and support your ideas sufficiently. While your response covered the topic, greater depth and development of ideas are necessary to achieve a higher score.
task achievement
Convey your ideas clearly and concisely. Aim for precision in your language use and ensure each paragraph presents comprehensive and well-thought-out concepts. The language could be more precise to convey clearer and more comprehensive ideas.
task achievement
Use relevant, specific examples to support your arguments. These examples should be illustrative of your points and enhance the overall argument. You provided a good use of specific examples, but consider expanding on them to demonstrate a thorough understanding of the topic.