Many university students cannot find a job in their chosen profession. What factors may have caused this situation and what, in your opinion, should be done about it?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is widely known that there are many
university
Use synonyms
graduates who are unable to work in their desired fields after they finish their studies.
This
Linking Words
essay will elucidate the causes behind
this
Linking Words
phenomenon and offer solutions to tackle the problems.
To begin
Linking Words
with, the most common reason is the fact that fresh graduates usually do not have the technical skills that their chosen profession requires. Possessing technical knowledge is an essential factor that employers consider when assessing
job
Use synonyms
applicants. Meanwhile,
university
Use synonyms
students
Use synonyms
tend to focus more on theoretical aspects rather than practical sides.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
circumstance is exacerbated by limited
job
Use synonyms
availability
due to
Linking Words
increasing competition in
job
Use synonyms
markets. To cite an example, there are fewer
jobs
Use synonyms
in government institutions than the number of
students
Use synonyms
holding a degree in political science.
Nonetheless
Linking Words
, there are certainly some steps that can be taken to face those challenges.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
university
Use synonyms
students
Use synonyms
should take internship
jobs
Use synonyms
prior to applying
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
full-time
jobs
Use synonyms
. Having more exposure to the professional world,
students
Use synonyms
can identify the practical skills they need in order to excel in those
jobs
Use synonyms
. After completing internships, they can
also
Linking Words
consider finding
jobs
Use synonyms
in different cities to increase the probability of finding their dream occupations.
For instance
Linking Words
, they can try to browse
jobs
Use synonyms
in the top five largest cities in their country. In conclusion, the main rationales that hinder
university
Use synonyms
graduates from getting their desired profession are twofold, they are the lack of technical abilities and the low number of
job
Use synonyms
postings.
University
Use synonyms
students
Use synonyms
can mitigate these by joining internship programs and expanding their
job
Use synonyms
-searching efforts
Submitted by tnindrasetiawan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that logical structure is consistently clear throughout the essay. While you have made an effort to organize your ideas, there were certain points in the essay where the connection between ideas could be made clearer. Focus on linking sentences and paragraphs more explicitly to improve the flow of your argument.
task achievement
In your examples, aim for more specific and detailed descriptions which reflect real-world scenarios, as well as statistics or studies that could strengthen the argument. This will make your points more convincing.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: