IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Most career choices demand vocational skills or specialist knowledge. However, despite this, most schools still teach academic subjects such as history or social studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this?

It can be denied that many employers require practical
skills
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 or specialised knowledge as one of the considerations for accepting job applicants.
This
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 makes current schools introduce vocational
subjects
Use synonyms
 into their curriculum.
However
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, academic
subjects
Use synonyms
 are still mandatory for
students
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.
This
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 essay will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of maintaining academic
subjects
Use synonyms
 in class. One notable benefit of academic materials is that they improve
students
Use synonyms
' sense of critical thinking.
This
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 is mostly because
such
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 academic
subjects
Use synonyms
 often deal with questions without a correct answer, encouraging
students
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 to develop reasoning
skills
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. In social science,
for example
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, there may be a chapter where
students
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 are asked to discuss the reasons behind poverty. It allows them to analyse and exchange opinions, making
students
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 more aware of social issues.
In addition
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, academic
subjects
Use synonyms
 are a strong foundation for
further
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 study.
Students
Use synonyms
 who wish to enter university must master these basics before specialising in vocational fields. On the downside, academic lessons are often perceived as irrelevant to the work environment.
While
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students
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 spend their time solely on theoretical study, they miss out on practical training, thereby widening the
skills
Use synonyms
 gap in the labour market.
For instance
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, around 40% of high school graduates in Indonesia were unable to secure employment, primarily
due to
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 insufficient competencies.
Moreover
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, some
students
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 may prefer to learn practical
skills
Use synonyms
,
such
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 as programming or robotics, which are not taught in basic classes, making
students
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 feel that academic lessons are a waste of time. In conclusion, academic
subjects
Use synonyms
 certainly bring several drawbacks related to
students
Use synonyms
' personal passions and job opportunities.
However
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, they have a vital role in fostering critical thinking, expanding basic knowledge, and preparing
higher
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for higher
show examples
 education.

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planning
Plan before you write. Use 2-3 clear ideas for each side. Start with what you will say, then give a short example. End with a short conclusion that restates the view.
cohesion
Make good links. Use words like 'for example', 'also', 'however', 'in addition' to join ideas. Each paragraph should have one main idea.
task response
Be clear on stance. The first line should state the view even if you discuss both sides.
grammar
Check grammar. Some sentences are long. Use shorter sentences to avoid mistake.
strength
Two clear side points with some support.
strength
Introduction and conclusion present.
strength
Examples added to support point.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • broad knowledge
  • critical thinking
  • foster
  • well-rounded education
  • cultural awareness
  • empathy
  • global citizenship
  • innovation
  • creativity
  • laying the groundwork
  • directly prepare
  • skills gap
  • workforce
  • practical, hands-on experience
  • vocational training
  • societal bias
  • traditional academic pathways
  • technical education
  • direct relevance
  • motivation
  • engagement
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