Advertisements play a major role on TV in market economics. Despite the benefits of such information, many people criticize the role of TV advertising. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

Nowadays,
TV
advertisemets
Correct your spelling
advertisements
advertisement
influence strongly on
economy
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the economy
show examples
.
While
huge
Change the article
a huge
the huge
show examples
number of people support
idea
Add an article
the idea
an idea
show examples
,
that is
not so, I completely disagree with
this
point. There are two reasons why
ad
Fix the agreement mistake
ads
show examples
on television shouldn't be abandoned.
Firstly
,
Advertisement
is not only about promotion,
also
it provides a lot of jobs for different
category
Fix the agreement mistake
categories
show examples
of people. If
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
show examples
cease advertising their product on
TV
,  humans that belong to professions
such
as actors,
director
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directors
show examples
,
editor
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editors
show examples
and
designer
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designers
show examples
will have a risk of unemployment. Joblessness have
awful
Add an article
an awful
show examples
impact on
Correct article usage
the economic
show examples
economic
Replace the word
economy
show examples
of
country
Add an article
the country
show examples
.
Secondly
,
elderly
Correct article usage
the elderly
show examples
,
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the majority audience
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
TV
can trust the advert on television
due to
strict censorship.
Furthemore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, it
one
Add a missing verb
is one
show examples
of the most popular
way
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ways
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
of good purchases among old people.   I
belive
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
that
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
positively affect the market economies. AD
one
Add a missing verb
is one
show examples
of the best
promotion
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promotions
show examples
fo many for companies, that manufacture
product
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products
show examples
for old and
middle-age
Correct your spelling
middle-aged
show examples
humans. When
profit
Correct article usage
the profit
show examples
of companies
increase
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increases
show examples
,
Correct article usage
the economic
show examples
economic
Replace the word
economy
show examples
of
country
Add an article
the country
show examples
rise
Correct subject-verb agreement
rises
show examples
too
due to
taxes
Correct article usage
the taxes
show examples
, that
businessmans
Correct your spelling
businessman
businessmen
pay.
Also
,
governmenments
Correct your spelling
governments
in some cases
prefwr
Correct your spelling
prefer
to use
TV
advertisement
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advertisements
show examples
for social
video
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videos
show examples
or
announcement
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announcements
show examples
for
local
Add an article
the local
show examples
public.          In
conlusion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, my view is that citizens should stop to
critisize
Correct your spelling
criticize
criticise
advertisement
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advertisements
show examples
and begin to appreciate
impact
Add an article
the impact
show examples
on economic and job
opportunity
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opportunities
show examples
for some
kind
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kinds
show examples
of experts.
Submitted by vikashin24022007 on

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Task Response
In your introduction, make sure to address the prompt directly and present a clear thesis statement that reflects your stance on the issue. Avoid general statements that don't directly answer the question.
Coherence & Cohesion
Develop your paragraphs with clear topic sentences that relate to the central argument and make sure each paragraph contains a coherent point related to the topic. Use linking words and phrases to ensure a smooth flow between ideas.
Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure that your introduction and conclusion are clear and that they effectively present and summarize your main argument. They should serve as bookends to your discussion and guide the reader through your essay.
Task Response
Support your main points with relevant and specific examples or explanations. Avoid generalizations and make sure the evidence is directly related to your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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