As compared to the past, children these days spend more of their leisure time indoors with computures and TV and less time outdoors. Describe some of the problems this lack of outdoor leisure time can cause and suggest at least one possible solution.

Compared to the past,
children
nowadays spend more of their free
time
indoors
with technology than outdoors.
This
essay will discuss the problems caused by the lack of outdoor activities and suggest a few potential solutions. First of all, the absence of outdoor free
time
will cause some health issues.
For example
, researchers have proven that facing screens will lead to visual impairment, and a lack of body movement will lead to obesity. Another cause is that
children
will not be able to develop social skills by spending their
time
on
computers
and other electronic devices
indoors
.
This
often results in bad communication skills, loneliness, and depression.
This
shows that there are major
causes
for the absence of outdoor
leisure
time
,
such
as health and social problems.
On the other hand
, there are potential solutions to the
causes
. It is recommended that parents reduce the amount of
time
children
spend on technology in the house. If parents are restricted in limiting the
time
spent on
computers
and TV screens
indoors
, it will reduce its risks.
For instance
, an hour a day is convenient for the child to spend in the house watching TV and using
computers
. A second solution would be introducing outdoor hobbies for
children
to practice,
such
as football, basketball, swimming, and other outdoor activities.
Therefore
, in order to overcome the
causes
of indoor
leisure
time
, it is advocated that
children
should be limited in their
time
using technology and experience other outdoor interests. In conclusion,
children
these days prefer spending their
leisure
time
indoors
instead
of going out.
This
essay has discussed the
causes
of indoor
leisure
time
, which are health issues and a lack of social skills.
This
essay suggested two solutions: limiting
time
spent on
computers
and TV screens and enrolling in outdoor hobbies.
Submitted by dana-sh on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay provides a coherent response to the task with a clear introduction and conclusion. However, the argument could be enhanced with more varied sentence structures and connectors to improve the logical flow.
task achievement
Your main points are supported but could benefit from more specific examples and details to illustrate the problems and to provide a more in-depth analysis of the proposed solutions.
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