In some cultures, children are often told that they can achive anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

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Nowadays, some adults teach their children that if they work harder
then
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they will get payback.
This
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way has some benefits and
also
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a few drawbacks, the following content will outline the
explaination
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explanation
.
Firstly
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,
it is clear that
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this
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is
a
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an
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effective method to encourage
kids
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,
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apply
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because they will enhance their proficiency
while
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chasing the goal.
For example
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,
mathematic
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mathematics
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lesson is always a complicated problem for students, some of them give up during learning because lack of
inconfidence
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confidence
in confidence
of
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in
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their abilities.
However
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, if they believed they
will
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would
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obtain
better
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a better
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scores
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score
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scores
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,when they
study
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studied
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or
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practice
Wrong verb form
practised
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more,
this
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would
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motivate
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motive
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motivate
show examples
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them
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they
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them
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to
practice
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the lesson harder.
As a result
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, they are willing to learn by themselves.
Nevertheless
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, talent is more important than effort in certain fields,
therefore
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, children might face more failures and lead to
inconfident
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confident
in confident
than previous.
For instance
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, art is a very classic sample, some
kids
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use
Verb problem
spend
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most of their time
to
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practising
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practice
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, but
could not
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cannot
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acquire
better
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a better
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level.
In contrast
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, a few of them are born
for
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in
show examples
this
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field, they reach higher
level
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levels
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more rapidly
by
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with
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less
practice
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. At
this
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moment, the former
kids
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could feel frustrated when they understand the gap between them and the latter
kids
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.
Therefore
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,
this
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could be an obvious drawback for certain students. In conclusion, the message could encourage people easily, because they believe the final result could be influenced by their effort.
However
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,
this
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could
also
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be a shortage when people realise their time and energy spent throughout the process could be useless. Personally, I think the ways of teaching need to be
catergorised
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categorised
categorized
to different children
,
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apply
show examples
and find the appropriate method to teach each of them.
Submitted by chaoweikevin on

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Coherence & Cohesion
The essay needs a clearer and more coherent structure. Use clear paragraphs, each beginning with a topic sentence that succinctly states the main idea of the paragraph.
Task Achievement
Examples provided should be more detailed and relevant to support the argument better. They could be drawn from a wider range of sources and should be directly related to the point being made.
Coherence & Cohesion
Work on using a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas within and between paragraphs.
Task Achievement
Improve on the completeness of the response by addressing all parts of the task more fully and ensuring that both advantages and disadvantages are explored equally.
Task Achievement
Enhance clarity by precisely stating ideas and avoiding generalizations that could make the arguments vague.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Perseverance
  • Resilience
  • Self-Esteem
  • Aspirations
  • Growth Mindset
  • Innate Ability
  • Unrealistic Expectations
  • Frustration
  • Disappointment
  • Pressure
  • Stress
  • Overwhelmed
  • Anxious
  • External Factors
  • Inherent Talents
  • Lofty Goals
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